Larry H's Movie Reviews for 2004
Index of Movies:
Phantom of the Opera | Sideways | The Life Aquatic | The Aviator | Flight of the Phoenix | Meet the Fockers | Finding Neverland | Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events | Ocean's Twelve | Christmas With The Kranks | National Treasure | The Polar Express | The Incredibles | Ray | Taxi | Friday Night Lights | Ladder 49 | The Forgotten | Cellular | Hero and Anacondas: The Hunt for Blood | Napoleon Dynamite | Garden State | The Village | Collateral | The Manchurian Candidate | The Bourne Supremacy | The Notebook | Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy | Spider-Man 2 | Fahrenheit 9/11 | The Terminal | The Stepford Wives | The Day After Tomorrow | Shrek 2 | New York Minute | Man On Fire | Kill Bill - Vol. 2 | The Alamo | Ladykillers | Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind | NASCAR 3D: The IMAX Experience | Starsky and Hutch | The Passion of the Christ | Welcome to Mooseport | Barber Shop 2 | 21 Grams | Monster | House of Fog and Sand | Something's Gotta Give
The complete name of this movie is "Andrew Lloyd Webber's Phantom of the Opera" since he is responsible for the music and co-wrote the screenplay with Director Joel Schumacher. Both will receive nominations for their work which is their interpretation of yet the latest movie about the mysteries and love of Paris' Opera Populaire circa 1870. The original source for this classic is the 1911 novel by Gaston Leroux.
This is my eighth movie in 14 days and I feel pretty good about it even though some of you people challenge my work habits. I'll have you know that I work 24/7. That's 24 hours a week and 7 months of the year.
The Phantom (Gerard Butler) is a disfigured musical genius and perhaps madman who haunts the Paris opera psychologically and by intimidation through "accidents" that cause injury and death. He is in love with a chorus girl named Christine Daae (Emmy Rossum) who unfortunately for the Phantom is in love with her childhood sweetheart Raoul (Patrick Wilson). Raoul is handsome and the wealthy Vicompte de Chagny - the patron of the opera. The new owners took over the opera, but the Phantom insists that the chorus girl Christine be elevated to the leading role and demote the diva Carlotta (Minnie Driver). There are enough twist and turns and songs for everyone to shine in this splendid movie.
Everyone connected with this movie will be a big winner in nominations and future gigs because of their roles and production. Emmy Rossum (Sean Penn's daughter in "Mystic River") will be nominated for Best Actress and probably will win. This eighteen year old is superbly talented; she can act, sing, and is beautiful. She will be forever remembered as Christine. During the movie I kept thinking that she and Eric H. (age 18) would make a nice couple and I could help out by being her agent. It's the least I could do.
This movie is beautiful and will win for costumes (slam dunk) and other choreography type awards. There was so much going on that I was confident that I was missing much of what Director Schumacher was throwing my way. I would like to see this movie on DVD with "director comments." Magnifico! Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 94. Larry H.
This movie has received seven Golden Globe nominations and I had not given it a second thought until those nominations were announced. So now I had to go see it before you did so I could let you know what's up. The closest theatre to Sugar Land showing "Sideways" is Studio 30 on Dunvale in Southwest Houston. I decided to take a shortcut on the Westpark Tollway but missed the exit. I'd never been on that Tollway before; they did not include enough exits to suit me, but I was able to get refreshments and find a seat in time for the opening credits in spite of my "detour."
This is an ensemble movie. The two main characters are Miles (Paul Giamatti) and Jack (Thomas Haden Church - Lowell from "Wings") who are best friends on a week-long last fling in the California wine country before Jack gets married. Actually, Jack is on a fling to find women and party while Miles is sulking about his ex-wife, the latest rejection of his novel, and life in general. Miles reminded me of a 70's Jack Lemon at his neurotic best.
Miles and Jack meet a waitress named Maya (Virginia Madsen) and a winery worker Stephanie (Sandra Oh). The two ladies and Jack are ready to hook up but Miles is a wet blanket and almost derails the whole deal. The lively banter between these compelling characters as a result of a solid screenplay creates an entertaining story that gets funnier and more interesting as the movie develops. There was much laughter and the best laughs are in the end when we know the characters intimately. Jack is a cad of the first order but manages to be endearing and charming while acting in a loathsome manner. And that ain't easy to do. Madsen and Oh are on my short list for Best Supporting Actress. This ensemble cooks; Director/Writer Alexander Payne has arrived. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 91. Larry H.
The holidays have me all crazy and I'm having a hard time thinking straight. And I just ate a giant piece of homemade gingerbread covered in whip cream. I gotta stop seeing movies and then returning home instead going back to the office. See what I mean...I'm going black...I need my routine back!
If you are not crazy, but you would like to become a little crazed, then go see this movie. Bill Murray (Capt. Steve Zissou) stars as a Jacque Cousteau wannabe who is at the end of a dubious career but wants to make one more documentary with his quirky crew a.k.a. Team Zissou. The "team" consists of Angelica Huston who is his sugar momma and estranged wife; Owen Wilson who may or may not be his son; Cate Blanchett as an unmarried reporter and happens to be five months pregnant; Willem Dafoe as the devoted and mildly insane first mate; and Jeff Goldblum who describes himself as partially gay.
With that cast of wackos, throw in Wes Anderson as co-writer and director and you have a unique movie. Captain Zissou smokes a little weed (ok, he smokes a lot of weed) but he seems to be under control...well not really. The captain has trouble staying on course not to mention finding financing and the shark that ate his partner. He vows to "...get drunk and in 10 days find the shark that ate my partner and destroy it." He describes it as a "jaguar shark" because that's the first thing that popped into his mind.
The Captain Zissou character is a lot like the Bill Murray we know. Bill could have mailed in his performance but I like Bill Murray so I found his character charming and humorous. There was much laughter from the audience which was dominated by college age kids. The screenplay might get some accolades; the movie is a nice blend of deadpan humor and slapstick. Going on the high seas with Captain Steve Zissou is a fun ride. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 90. Larry H.
This must be the short version; I'm on my way to see another flick before I have to go back to work tomorrow. I saw this movie with Monique H. on the day after Christmas, but only now have the time to make my comments. Let me begin with the bad news: Loew's staff at the concession stand no longer applies butter to the popcorn. Now we have to go over to the side and "put it on your own popcorn." I was not consulted about this change and I am not happy. Shoot, if I wanted to apply my own butter I could go to AMC. And it is a scientific fact that butter tastes better when another human puts it on a my popcorn.
While Leo DiCaprio did a good job in his portrayal of Howard Hughes, the award is still Jamie Foxx' to lose. Martin Scorcese once again proved that he is a masterful director, but I did not want to see a sad but true biography of one of America's richest and most peculiar men ever to make a over-budget movie and design and race airplanes. Oh yeah, and date all the babes in Hollywood at the same time that he was building a financial empire and washing his hands 10 times a day.
I did not like this Howard Hughes and could not relate to the character. I did not care about him which is the kiss of death for me in evaluating a movie. However, the story is so interesting and the movie is very well directed and edited that I was not bored. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 87. Larry H.
I first attended the annual Christmas party by my old friend and client Joe S. He throws a good party, but I had to eat and run because I had already laid my tactical plan to see "Flight of the Phoenix" at Cinemark on the Tollway on the way back to the office.
I've been waiting for this movie for a long time because I am a huge fan of the original 1965 movie of the same name starring Jimmy Stewart as Captain Frank Towns and Richard Attenborough, Peter Finch, Ernest Borgnine, George Kennedy, and most importantly Hardy Krueger as Heinrich Dorfman. The Dorfman character this time is played by Giovanni Ribisis and the character is "Elliott." And I am convinced that the weak link in this movie is primarily the fault of Director John Moore allowing "Elliott" to be such a wimpy, effeminate designing of the reconstructed airplane that will save all that have crashed in the present-day Gobi Desert of Mongolia.
The conflict between Jimmy Stewart's character and the hard headed know-it-all Dorfman was the key to the success of the first movie. In this remake, everyone runs over this Dana Carvey-like boob who also worked as a designer of model airplanes as did Dorfman.
In spite of its flaws, I generally enjoyed the movie and as my friend Jack N. said "...it has a really good beginning and a good ending." That pretty much nails this film. But don't listen to the mainstream critics, this film is worth the price of admission; just don't expect Jimmy Stewart to be re-incarnated by Dennis Quaid and realize that "Dorfman" doesn't exist and you'll be alright. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 88. Larry H.
My staff, the lovely and talented Margaret M. and Jody B., invited me to eat lunch with them today at the local Mexican food restaurant. But I could see that glint in their eye that screamed "...hey, we're just being nice to the boss...why don't you go to the movies." And I replied, "...well, thank you very much for the invite but I guess I'll just eat popcorn and Mr. Pibb and I'll be back around 1:30 pm." I got back to the office a little before two; close enough. They brought me a cookie.
I've been waiting for the Fockers to come to town ever since I learned that the parents of Ben Stiller's character from the original "Meet the Parents" were none other than Dustin and Babs. Also starring were Bobby DeNiro as the very uptight, distrustful ex-CIA agent and his easy-going wife Blythe Danner. How can you miss with that lineup? This movie comes close to bombing but the one-liners and acting saved the day. Hoffman's performance was my favorite. He plays a touchy, feely lawyer that was a stay-at-home Mr. Mom so his wife Barbra S. could "win the bread" by running her sex therapy practice out of their 100 year old Miami home. Come to find out- Stillers' real name was not Greg but Gaylord Focker. Exsqueeze me?
The audience was large; around 65 and a big cross-section so it will be a big hit, and they laughed a lot and on cue. I thought it was ok and at times hilarious but the script was weak and production unimpressive. Not bad for a Wednesday afternoon instead of eating Mexican food. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 86. Larry H.
I made it to my second movie today, and I am at home before the sun's going down so I guess that makes the day pretty successful. But not perfect.
This movie is "inspired by true events" if you believe the opening credits. The story is about J.M. Barrie (Johnny "Scissorhands" Depp), the Scottish playwright, that wrote "Peter Pan." Seems he got the original idea from hanging around four young boys and their widowed mother (Kate Winslet) in 1903 London. Depp's character is married but he spends most of his time with the Widow Davies and her four boys playing in the park, flying kites and such. Occasionally, the movie will warp into fantasy/animation with intros of Captain Hook/Tinker Bell etc.
But here is the real story: I hated everyone in the movie and walked out about an hour into it. I deserve a medal for staying that long. There were about 10 of us in attendance and I'm fairly certain that the only laughter came from a couple of dreamy-eyed teenage girls that were there to see Mr. Cool. I admit that Johnny D. is in a class by himself and Monique H. thinks he's as cute as I am, but even he couldn't carry this flick.
I knew it was time to leave when Kate Winslet's character was coughing severely because of a "chest cold" and I was hoping she'd die. The little boys were all snotty-nosed brats; Mrs. Barrie was a shrew. And get this: Dustin Hoffman is the financier of Barrie's plays and his character was completely unimportant and forgettable. I felt as though the ending might have some entertaining twists, but I just couldn't risk it.
And here's something else: I don't like the British; they talk funny and they're sissies. Tally ho, Old Chap! Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 69W. Larry H.
Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events
When Monique H. got up this morning she found me sitting by the fire staring at the lighted Christmas tree with a smile on my face. I had been up since 5:15 am; I heard the delivery of the paper hit the sidewalk. With her head cocked to one side she said "...you're up to something...you're up to no good...what are you going to do...why are you up so early." Who could pass up such an opportunity? I replied "...why, my dear wife, I'm as innocent as the ...." I could not think of the appropriate word; "innocent" and "Larry H." don't normally share the same sentence. But the truth: I was so excited about my plan today to see two movies and be home before the sun goes down and do all my work at the office... And I have a big Toys for Tots Pistol Match Saturday morning and a Christmas Party Saturday night and then there's church and another party Sunday night. Party on!
I didn't know the difference between Lemony Snicket and Jiminy Cricket, but a movie with Jim Carrey as the evil Count Olaf and Meryl Streep as Aunt Josephine based on a Nickelodeon movie was too much to pass. The is a beautifully made movie and will garner several nominations. My pick for awards include Best Screenplay by Robert Gordon whose adaptation from the original series of books by Lemony Snicket (Daniel Handler) was masterful as were the art and set design, and visual effects. I don't know the names of all those awards but you know what I'm talking about.
The audience was a cross-section from pre-schoolers to Grandpa, but it is primarily a kids movie that tells a story of three wonderful recently-orphaned children: Violet the 14 year old who is pretty, loving, and an "inventor"; Klaus about 12 years old who is cute, loving, and a "reader"; and an infant girl named Sunny who is charming, loving, and a "biter" as in she bites things. The infant Sunny also giggles a lot and utters baby sounds like "ra" and "ga" and then subtitles appear on the screen further explaining what the darling child really means. The adults in the movie are either evil, stupid, or a combination. But certainly not loving.
The story is universal about fear and love as seen through the eyes of resourceful and clever kids with the added theme of "we all need family." Not bad for the Christmas season, I suppose. I found that I had "respect" for this movie which is not really a turn-on for me. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 85. Larry H.
I had to go to court this morning which means I had to wear a coat and tie which means my Friday is off kilter. I've told these judges before not to hold court on Fridays but nobody listens.
This movie is a sequel to "Ocean's Eleven" which was a remake of the old Frank Sinatra/Rat Pack movie from the 60's. George Clooney, Brad Pitt, Matt Damon, Julia Roberts and the old gang return plus Catherine Zeta-Jones-Douglas. The plot was...I don't care to share; I did not like this movie a little bit. I didn't walk out because I could not believe that the great director Steven Soderbergh could bungle this movie with all that talent.
Here is a suggestion for a re-name of this re-make: "Spit in the Ocean" because it ain't worth spit. All in all, I enjoyed the outing and can hardly wait to go to the movies again. I think we call that glutton. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 70. Larry H.
You know the rule: No one goes to the movies with Larry H. Well, there's this old college bud that came to town and really, really wanted to tag along to see what this Friday afternoon ritual is all about. I said "okay" but I told Martin T. that I pick the movie, the theatre, and the time...and he could not sit by me. I allowed him to sit within a couple of seats, but no talking please. Martin has always been a little crazy which is why we've been friends for over thirty years.
"Christmas With The Kranks" stars Tim Allen as Luther Krank and Jamie Lee Curtis as Nora Krank. I'd go see a movie based on that alone; you gotta love anybody named Krank. The movie is based on the book by John Grisham who strayed from his usual legal thriller to pen this fluffy story about a family, actually Luther, which decides to skip Christmas, save a bunch of money, and go on a Caribbean cruise. The daughter of Luther and Nora was not planning to be home with her parents since she was working for the Peace Corp in Peru so "Skipping Christmas" sounded like a good idea.
The Kranks did not participate in the usual decorating of their home, exchanging gifts, and hosting their annual Christmas Eve party. And the neighbors and friends were outraged that anyone had the audacity to opt out of the tradition of Christmas. The Kranks were the target of much peer pressure and neighborhood gossip and harassment. But Luther and Nora fought back...well actually they hid in their house to avoid the do-gooders.
The storyline is not complicated nor designed to make a huge statement about our society other than the common bah-humbug and Scrooge angle. The additional cast of Dan Aykroyd, Cheech Marin, Jake Busey, Tom Poston, and M. Emmett Walsh are charming and likeable, but the movie never climbs out of mediocrity in spite of some very funny lines and pratfalls by Tim Allen and Jamie Lee. One extra treat for the ladies: Jamie Lee has the guts to appear briefly in a teeny weenie bikini that exposes her very mature body.
Tim Allen's character is a combination of Tim the Tool Time Guy from his TV show and Clark Griswold from "Vacation." Wait for this movie to appear on the USA channel and you'll be fine. The big movies will be out in the next 2-3 weeks. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 82. Larry H.
I got extra butter on my popcorn. Not a good idea. I had to use an abnormal amount of napkins to mop up and I discovered about a two square inch greasy blob on the front of my shirt. I'm thinking about dropping it off at the cleaners on the way home. If Monique H. sees it, she will then bring up the unidentified stain on the carpet in the bathroom and other little accidents and before you know it, we'll have this whole Thanksgiving thing going. It just ain't worth it; I'm headed to the cleaners. But wait...what will I wear home? Dang.
Nicolas Cage stars as Benjamin Franklin Gates who is a third generation treasure hunter. Gates has the cleverness of Indiana Jones, the savvy of James Bond, and the resourcefulness of Mission Impossible. The boy has good skills. He's looking for the biggest treasure of all time and must steal the Declaration of Independence to figure out an intricate series of clues and riddles in order to get closer to the treasure...if there is a treasure...his dad Patrick (Jon Voight) insists that the signers of the Declaration of Independence merely wanted the British to think there was a hidden treasure to throw them off the trail.
Of course, there is a competing rich bad guy (Sean Bean) who has a mean posse with a lot of guns that want to find the treasure first and they are willing to kill people. But don't get too worried; this movie has jokes and gags throughout. And then there is the FBI led by Harvey "Mr. Wolfe" Keitel. By the time Agent-in-Charge Keitel showed up, I was having so much fun with this movie, I wanted to jump up and cheer.
B. F. Gates has a loveable sidekick Riley (Justin Bartha) who is the cute computer guy and Gates somehow involves a document curator from the National Archives to tag along on the chase for the treasure. The curator is a fox (Diane Kruger) who is so upset that the Declaration of Independence has been stolen that she will throw in with the bad guys to ensure the safety of the document. But who are the bad guys? Do not let the seemingly silly plot sour you on this wonderful movie. It is the most fun I've had at the theatre in a while. Do yourself a Thanksgiving favor and check it out; it is going to be a monster box-office hit. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 92. Larry H.
"Would the owner of the silver Toyota Avalon license plate H26 VFB, please report to the manager's office, you are parked in Larry H's assigned parking spot and you are in big trouble, Mister!" You people are taking your life in your own hands; please do not make me come over there.
When I walked into Loew's at the Fountains Theatre #17, there were only a few minutes until show time. This theatre is one of the big ones; seats about 600. After I sat down, there were 599 vacant seats. Then several minutes of privacy passed while I watched the previews of even more animations, two moms and two tots arrive with some fanfare and lots of chatter. Both the kids were wearing caps and I could not see their bodies on the other side of the theatre but I could see those caps bouncing up and down as they climbed the stairs. Please, Lord, this is a giant theatre; please don't let them sit by me. And I'll be dat gum if the whole crew didn't waddle up to within 15 feet of me and sit down in the middle of the row in front of me.
This movie is based on the book by Chris Van Allsburg about a young boy who doubts the authenticity of Santa Claus and all that around the world gift-giving in one night sleigh ride kind of thing. The movie begins on Christmas Eve as the boy is trying to go to sleep and before you can say "Ray Charles" the boy is out his front door in his pajamas and robe boarding a train that will take him to the North Pole and the home of Mr. Claus. There are other kids on the train and the loveable no-nonsense conductor is a computer image of Tom Hanks. The train ride on the Polar Express is exciting and fun, but Director Bob Zemeckis gets bogged down in detail and showy special effects upon arrival to the hometown of Santa Claus and the movie suffers.
However, the movie has taken "animation" to another level; the hair on the little boy was phenomenal as well as the body movements of the characters guided by special suits that react to lasers, computers etc. The music and sound were outstanding. The main character reminded me of my brother, Vernon H., when he was about 10. At times during the movie I felt the spirits of "The Wizard of Oz," and "Close Encounters of the Third Kind."
This is a good movie for kids if they are not taller than a movie theatre chair. Those two kids talked nonstop; here is a sample of their queries: "Mom, where is that train going; is he gonna die; why is it dark in that tunnel; is that really Santa Clause; what's in that present, is he gonna make it home?" Sitting by those little freaks was one of the highlights of the movie. I found myself trying to listen closely to their comments so I would better understand what Zemeckis was trying to accomplish.
Tom Hanks was one of the Executive Producers so I hope the movie is very successful because I know he and Rita could use some extra cash around Christmastime. Hanks recruited the old gang: Zemeckis from "Forrest Gump" and "Cast Away"; Peter Scolari his "Bosom Buddies"; Michael Jeter who played Eduard "Mouse" Delacroix in the "The Green Mile" and Steven Tyler from who the heck knows; maybe Hanks and Tyler sat around the movie set and talked about the bad 'ole days of the 70's. I want to be Tom Hanks' friend. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 78. Larry H.
I got caught by a train on Highway 90 on the way to Loew's, but not to be denied I whipped my silver SUV out of the stalled traffic and sped off and slipped in the "back way" via the Southwest Freeway. Made it in record time considering the obstacles. You kids should not try it.
"The Incredibles" has a very clever premise: Mr Incredible (Craig T. "Coach" Nelson) is a mild mannered guy during the day but also dresses up in a tight-fitting outfit and catches bad guys at night when he is not being Mr. Normal Guy. Unfortunately, Mr. Incredible creates some havoc which causes a few deaths and injuries and so he gets sued repeatedly. What's a superhero to do? Go into the government's superhero protection plan with his superhero wife Elastigirl aka Helen (Holly Hunter) and live a life undercover in suburbia. Mr. I. goes to work for Insuracare which turns down all claims by its policyholders.
Mr I. aka Bob Parr is very sad not being a superhero and working for a crooked insurance company. Instead of dealing with his problem of addiction to super-heroism, he and retired superhero Frozone (Samuel L. Jackson) pretend (denial) to go bowling but they really listen to police scanners so they can save people from burning buildings and such. Bob/Mr. I. gets caught up in some shady superhero stuff and ...I don't know what happened next.
I couldn't take it anymore. You people know that I am not prejudice against animation or Pixar. I loved "Toy Story" and "Shrek 1 and 2" but this "cartoon" was too stupid and lacked meaningful character development which I require of my animated flicks. I stayed almost an hour but when the jawbreaker-induced sugar high subsided and my eyes became droopy, I decided that I should also return to my undercover identity in the 'burbs. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 69 W. Larry H.
This movie reminded me of the old Flip Wilson joke in the '60s. "...the court jester (who sounded just like Flip) was trying to convince Queen Isabella of Spain that she should finance Christopher Columbus' crazy adventure, but the queen would have nothing of it...so, the court jester wanting to make his best pitch blurted out "...and Chris gonna find Ray Charles!" If you want to hear that punch line delivered in an uncanny mock of Flip Wilson, call me at the office on Monday and I will be happy to share.
This movie is a masterpiece. I know you think I just got caught up in all the nostalgic music and great acting and then became verklept. Ok, maybe so, but the story of Ray Charles as portrayed by Jamie Foxx will receive numerous Oscar nominations and will be a huge box office hit. There were over 125 folks at an 11:30 am showing and they clapped at the end.
I only got teary-eyed twice, if you count the time I had a flashback to a slow dance in 1965 with a Ray Charles song on the stereo. "What'd I Say" was on the top of the charts when I was a little boy and as a teenager I loved "Georgia" and "Hit the Road Jack." Jamie Foxx was not just playing Ray Charles, he became Ray Charles. Mr. Foxx' life is changed forever because of his performance.
The brilliant screenplay by James L. White takes us back to Ray's childhood of poverty and blindness by age 7 through his musical development, racial segregation, marriage, girlfriends, and his battle with heroin. And his monumental talent and success. The direction by Taylor Hackford and acting by Ray's mother, girlfriend, wife and Ray as a child are all potential nominations. The songs are sung by Ray Charles, but I believed Jamie Foxx was really singing them. And as part of the price of a ticket at my theatre (Loew's) they gave me a DVD entitled "Ray Charles Exclusive Video From the Making of Genius Loves Company." And I love the Raylettes! Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 94. Larry H.
I went to see some of my buds from my church this morning at a retreat center. I couldn't stay very long since this is Friday. I knew there might be trouble when one them shoved a bible across the table and almost hit my coffee cup and said "...hey, how come you can't stay...gotta go to one of those movies you always go to...do you ever work on Fridays?" Being the pious person that I am, I retorted with "...yeah, that's right, New Testament Breath, I'm going to a movie and I'm doing the Lord's work because I watch these movies and then I share my feelings so others will not have to spend their money unwisely and become bad stewards. The Lord works in mysterious ways.
As I was leaving the retreat center, my boy Wes F. suggested that I see the new Jimmy Fallon/Queen Latifah flick - "...it's pretty good." I appreciated his suggestion but I did not think I wanted to see a stupid movie about a Barney Fife cop that loses his driver's license due to incompetence so he pals around with a hip-hop taxi driver that thinks she's driving Jeff Gordon's #24 NASCAR ride built on the frame of Ford Crown Vic.
I got back to the office around noon which is my anointed time to be leaving the office. So, I hurriedly did my assigned tasks in about 15 minutes and then began scanning the show times to choose between the new J-Lo/Goofy Gere movie or maybe even "The Final Cut" starring Robin Williams. But alas, those movies were all starting after 2:00 pm. "Ah, what the heck...maybe 'ole Wes knows what he's talking about" and if I hurry I can catch the 12:35 pm start time for "Taxi." I made it to my seat at Loew's with about five seconds to spare. I was feeling very sassy.
And then the movie began...and I became drowsy... and speaking of God... then the God Bomb Theory kicked in. As a reminder, that theory goes something like this "Dear God, please send a bomb down and blow up this movie (without harming me or the other five people in the audience) so I can get the heck outta here and get on with my life...Amen." Well, the movie did not blow up and I stayed almost an hour in deference to Wes F. but I just couldn't persevere. I forgive you, Wes. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 65 W. Larry H.
This movie is a touchdown. I apologize for that trite statement, but I'm just trying to be like NBC's Gene Shalit.
It is about the 1988 football season of Texas' own Odessa Permian Panthers. The team is the town and the 17 year old boys feel the pressure...and glory. The story is told from a very human perspective and at times is painfully emotional. I was not enjoying the show because I was too sad and disgusted with it. Then I realized that it was still just a movie about a high school football team and if I was "emotional" about it at all, then it must be a pretty darn good movie.
I must cut this piece short because I'm in a hurry; gotta go to a high school football game. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 92. Larry H.
John Travolta is not the #1 star in this movie but he is the big dog. Travolta plays Captain Mike Kennedy the chief of a Baltimore firehouse and Joaquin "Gladiator" Phoenix is Jack Morrison the hero firefighter. It is a great role for Phoenix who does an admirable job, but I know John Travolta; John Travolta is a friend of mine and he's no John Travolta.
I was enamored with the screen presence and super-star talent of Travolta who saw a good part and took it even though he did not get top billing. Phoenix was ideal for the everyman's firefighter character.
The opening scenes are of a 20-story building heavily involved in fire. Jack Morrison is in the middle of the rescue efforts and courageously saves a man on the 12th floor and then suddenly the building collapses and Jack plummets below and is unable to move and near death. And then we have our first flashback to Jack's first day on the job as a "rookie" firefighter. Over the next hour and half we get to know Jack, his family, and the other firefighters. Director Jay Russell has made an excellent film about fighting fires and the perils of being a firefighter. This film could become the quintessential movie about firefighters.
We see the injuries and losses suffered by these men (no women firefighters) and a "firefighter's funeral." I attended one of these funerals for my friend David P. in July and the tradition and emotion of the brotherhood of firefighters was beautifully portrayed in this film. After typing the previous sentence, I needed to take a few deep breaths.
My interest and emotions were very high and at times near boredom, but overall this is a worthy film. I am currently in a sad mood. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 89. Larry H.
I had to go to the movies earlier than normal because I'm afraid the tropical storm formerly known as Hurricane Ivan might get me. But really, I ain't scared of no 'cane. Ok, there was this one 'cane in the early 60's that spooked me a little bit.
About 15 minutes into this movie, my stomach was rumbling. Do you think it could have been the popcorn and Milky Way combo with just a swig of Mr. Pibb? Sometimes I think I'm getting too old for this and then I stop to reflect on life and conclude..."nah, just shovel it in and all will be cool." I'm better now, thank you.
Julianne Moore can carry a film. She's pretty and has beautiful skin like my sisters. She plays a mother/Tiffy who has tragically lost her only son in a plane crash 14 months earlier. Or did she? Her son's photos and other memorabilia begin disappearing from the house. She's seeing a psychiatrist (Gary "Lt. Dan" Sinise) who is helping her cope with the grief but more importantly to come to grips with the fact that she never really had a son. Confused? Well, that is the mystery of the movie. She finds an ally in a former New York Rangers hockey player (Dominic West) who thinks that maybe he also lost a daughter in the same plane crash.
This movie is a cross between "X-File" and "Twilight Zone." Don't get all real and develop a need for plausibility and you'll be ok. Just go to the movies and watch this flick for what it is: a little make-believe story that is very well written, directed and acted. No biggie. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 88. Larry H.
Two little old ladies ambled up the stairs of Loew's Theatre #10; about 12 sets of steps. My first thought was "...hey, you people should sit in lower seats...you look like you might fall at any step." One of them was holding onto the railing and taking slow, measured steps while the other lady moved rapidly up the stairs. Well, they decided that the row behind me was far enough. The slow moving one followed into the second seat next to the aisle, but not before she grabbed the back of my "rocking" chair and whipped me backwards so fast and furious I'm sure I've re-injured my '99 whiplash. Shortly after they giggled and settled into their seats, the movie started. They began commenting on every scene and one of them was hard of hearing which caused the other to turn up the volume. Now the dilemma: do I shush them or do I pick up my drink and popcorn and move even farther up? Are you kidding? I'm scared of little old ladies; I packed my bags and headed north and hoped I did not offend them by implying that they were loud and rude.
I chose this movie out of desperation and I must see a movie on Friday afternoon...and if not, you might have noticed that I can get a little cranky. Gee, guess what kind of little old man I'll be as I waddle up the stairs holding onto the rail? This is why I plan to live in an Assisted Living home near a theatre...with a golf cart. Got it all planned.
Back to the movie. I liked it a lot. The story is appropriately suspenseful and fast-paced. Do not let believability creep into your consciousness and you will be fine. Kim Basinger is kidnapped by some real mean guys for reasons unknown. She is a high school science teacher married to a realtor and has an 11 year old son. The bad guys are trying to get something that involves her husband and they are willing to kill her and grab her son at school and kill him, too, unless they cooperate. While she is stashed away in an attic, she somehow clicks two wires together from a smashed-up phone and randomly contacts a young man named Ryan (Chris Evans) who is partying at the beach with his other knucklehead friends. Ryan answers his cell phone and is reluctantly brought into the mix. The story quickly develops a complicated sequence of events with just enough believability to make the movie entertaining. William H. "Fargo" Macy is a 27-year veteran of the LAPD who is looking forward to retirement but is also pulled into the web. I was totally focused on the movie and was eager to see what happened next which is the definition of a good suspense movie. This is not a great movie and it will not win any awards, but it is worth the price of admission which is saying a lot these days. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 90. Larry H.
Hero and Anacondas: The Hunt for Blood
I chose to see "Hero" this Labor Day Friday because of conflicting opinions by friends. My friend Ed P. called me this week to make sure I knew that he really liked "Hero" and I would also if I liked "Crouching Tiger...Running Bear" or whatever. My friend Curtis W., a student at the University of Texas in Austin emailed me to make sure that I knew that "Hero" was a bust. Both of these guys love the movies.
Mark one up for the college student. "Hero" was one long, confusing kung fu sword fight while defying gravity. I could not tell the players from one another and when I thought I knew who the good guys were, I did not care if they lived or died. I knew it was time to walk when a very brave holy-man- looking guy was sitting unflinchingly while many arrows were landing all around him but never striking him... and I was pulling for one of the arrows to hit the A zone and take him out. None of the arrows hit him; dang.
I quickly finished my treats and was out of there within twenty minutes. Not to be denied I confidently began roaming the hallways of Loew's at the Fountains looking for another movie. It's only 1:05 pm; plenty of time to catch another flick. That would be sweet.
The pickin's were slim but I decide to take a chance on "Anaconda" 2 since it appeared to be near its end. As I walked into the theatre I quickly perused the audience and lo behold there was not another living soul in the place. I like that; got the whole place to myself. And within seconds of sitting down one of the giant snakes bites a guy mid torso and snaps him. I'm thinking "ok, now we got something." Then the Bruce Willis type guy and the jive talking black guy with the two bimbo J-Lo wannabes show up on the screen. And they were a hoot. In the 50's we would call this a "B" movie; not that I was alive in the 50's. Ok, I was alive but I was very young. I didn't last ten minutes in this show. By 1:17 pm I'm heading back to my car with the satisfaction of walking two movies in about thirty minutes and a three day weekend staring me in the face. Gotta love America. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 69 W and 69 W. Larry H.
I'm confident that you've never heard of this film. Neither had I until Eric H. saw it and declared "...Dad you've got to see this movie; I'll even consider going again with you." The boy would have to be pretty desperate or very committed to see a film with his dad. After all, he is a senior in high school for pity's sake. When I asked him to go with me today, something came up and he just couldn't make it.
Napoleon Dynamite (Jon Heder) is a tall, gangly teenage white boy that has curly red hair, oversized glasses, a frightening stare, no physical prowess, lives with his grandmother and 32 year old brother who spends all of his time in chat rooms looking for babes, gets beat up by all the school bullies, and get this...he lives in Idaho. He wants a date to the high school dance but as you might imagine, he's not too lucky with the girls. His best friend is a new kid from Mexico named Pedro (Efren Ramirez). Pedro's claim to fame is that he can grow a mustache and he speaks with an accent like someone that would be making fun of a person fresh from Mexico. Napoleon's Uncle Rico is stuck in 1982 so much so that he buys a time machine in hopes of returning for another attempt at being the high school quarterback. The blonde cheerleader is named Summer Wheatly. Napoleon's almost girlfriend sells trinkets door-to-door and wears a ponytail pulled to one side. Pedro and Summer are the only two running for class president. Napoleon's best pick-up line in the cafeteria is "...I see that you are drinking 1%...is that because you think you're fat? Because you're not fat...you could drink 2%." Instead of cussing he says "heck yes!" and "flippin'." It's rated PG.
I laughed a lot.Napoleon is loveable and charming and I rarely felt sorry for him. He and Pedro are quite a pair of losers but we were pulling for them just the same. Writer and Director Jared Hess deserves props for this comedic masterpiece. Whoa, Big Boy, did you say "masterpiece?" Ok, it's Saturday and raining and I'm a little jumpy but this script is "special." Be sure to stick around after the credits for the "end" of the movie.
Who should see this movie? None of you. Wait for the DVD and laugh in the privacy of your own home. But I'm going to see it again with Eric H. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 88. Larry H.
I was feeling particularly bold so I bought some Snickers. The ones in a bag and the candy appear to be little balls of chocolate. Very tasty. About half way through my popcorn, I had a lucid moment: pour the remaining Snickers balls into the bag of popcorn and shake. The mix was mind-boggling yet refreshing.
Zack Braff wrote, directed and starred in this movie about Generation X struggling to find its way. Zack is my favorite intern on TV's "Scrubs" so I was eager to give the young man's movie a chance; it is his first feature film. I hope it is not his last but he will not get any financing from me on his next project. The movie poked its head out of mediocrity in an attempt to achieve cleverness and entertainment only to slide back to its roots of dullness. Even the editing and sound were sub-par.
The story begins when Andrew Largeman comes home for his mother's funeral. "Large," as he is called by his stoner friends, is an LA actor of small fame who has been on lithium prescribed by his psychiatrist father since he was ten; he is numb. He runs into two of his high school buds at his mom's funeral. The buds are not at the funeral but are waiting to bury his mom since their career path has led them to the backhoe profession. He meets a girl named Sam (Natalie Portman) at the neurologist's office. Both of them were at the neuro's office for legitimate reasons. They're screwed up and so are their families. The story continues for several more days and even though the plot bumps up against "interesting," I couldn't care less about these little losers. I know I should be a little more empathetic for a sweet love story, but I just couldn't make myself. Don't give up, Zack, but run it by Steven next time before you start shooting. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 73. Larry H. August 20, 2004 NASCAR DAY
My office is getting a fresh coat of paint and new carpet so suite 1020 is pretty bare just waiting for the onslaught this weekend. Consequently, I am off my usual game. I left for the movies earlier than usual because I don't like change and all our files are in storage... so what's a boy to do? I figured going to Loew's and eating some popcorn would get back my groove. I gots to have my groove.
I don't like to go to a movie that's been in release for a couple of weeks because I want to be first which means ahead of you people. I chose this flick for two reasons: 1) not any great movies opening today and 2) my red headed recent college graduate friend Katie P. strongly suggested that I see it. Please note that Eric H. saw it with his posse and he said it "blows."
Director M. Night Shyamalan ("Signs" and "The Sixth Sense") has once again shown that he is a master moviemaker who knows how to control the audience's emotions while capturing their interest and commitment. Typically for Shyamalan, he employs a suspenseful story, strategic music, a peculiar setting, and odd characters to weave a plot of fear and raw human emotions.
The basic story - the people of "The Village" do not dare go into the nearby woods because of creatures lurking within. The young people of the village know that many of the villagers have "secrets," and the audience is along for the ride. Early in the movie, I had the distinct feeling that Shyamalan was jacking with me and setting me up for the big twist. I had my guesses and so will you; it's part of the fun of this movie. I was a little scared but fascinated with the direction of the story because I was quite comfortable not knowing the next move. The allegorical screenplay is classic.
Here are the strong points of the movie: acting, story, costumes, music, editing, lighting, and cinematography. Outstanding performance by Bryce Dallas Howard (Ron's daughter) and William Hurt as her father. Strong performances by Joaquin Phoenix, Adrien Brody, and Sigourney Weaver.
Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 92. Larry H.
Tom Cruise plays a bad guy - a very, very bad man. Cruise's character "Vincent" is the best, most efficient hit man since... Vincent Vega in "Pulp Fiction." What's up with that name?
This Vincent has an agenda of killing five people in one night. Okay, that's not all that unusual, but riding around LA in a cab while making stops to make the hits is a tad off the norm. Jack Nicholson's Charley Partanna in "Prizzi's Honor" would never have used a cab to make multiple hits. You gotta let it go; this is a cool movie with some believability challenges but don't let your murder IQ mess up a good story.
The unwitting cab driver is Max (Jamie Foxx) who is the big winner in the movie. His performance was stunning. Foxx will be at the Academy Awards ceremony sitting next to Tom Cruise and Director Michael Mann. I'm not saying they will win or that they will be nominated, but this is a memorable film for Dreamworks and will be historical for the evilness of Cruise's portrayal. Footnote: Jamie Foxx might also get accolades for his upcoming movie about Ray Charles...we shall see.
This Vincent killed because it was his "job" and he had pride in his profession. Cruise took his character to a scary level of intensity and intrigue. And he could make a speed re-load of his semi-automatic Smith and Wesson faster than anyone in any movie anywhere anytime while putting "two in the torso and one in the head." I'm not saying he wasn't devilish, I'm just acknowledging that he was also an excellent marksman and gun handler.
The movie was a little slow in the middle primarily because Mann allowed the story to veer too far away from Foxx and Cruise. Amazingly, there are bits of humor mixed in with the violence and suspense. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 91. Larry H.
I've had computer trouble today so I've got a 'tude. Saw the movie around noon and here it is 9:00 pm and I still haven't communicated with you people. I had some stories about eating popcorn with my weak hand because I cut my thumb on my strong hand from shooting my AR-15 rifle Tuesday evening, but now I don't have time for that story and it was a good one.
Denzel and Meryl can still act but they could not save this movie. I did not care for this "suspense drama" of the re-tread of the Manchurian Global giant company putting implants in soldiers' heads so they can have their candidate become President. Big deal. I could do that.
Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 76. Larry H.
This is a sequel to "The Bourne Identity." Matt Damon once again is Jason Bourne the CIA agent with partial amnesia. He can't remember who he has killed or why folks are trying to kill him. In trying to solve the mystery and stay alive, he covers more of Europe than Lance Armstrong. And in doing so he displays the skills of James Bond, Kung Fu, and a Cat Burglar.
But I didn't like Jason Bourne or the horse he rode in on. I didn't like the bad guys, the good guys, or the people sitting behind me who repeatedly left their seat and kicked mine. There were 137 in attendance; I did not really count them, but I wanted you to think I did. I was so bored I would have gladly counted and/or interviewed them to see if they were as bummed out about this flick as I was. I suspect they were not. Seemed like a simple group of humans that probably like action flicks with a pretty boy "hero."
Hero my ankle. Bourne is not a hero; he's a fighting machine that doesn't know his butt from a nut. The women were not pretty and the men were inept schmucks. But the theatre was very cool and the thermometer in my car registered 111 degrees as I drove back to the office. I'm a lucky man. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 72. Larry H.
I wanted to see "De-Lovely" - the new movie about Cole Porter starring Kevin Kline but I could not work out de-schedule. I'd heard good things about "The Notebook" from several people and James "I'm Still Maverick" Garner was in it so that was good enough for me.
I caught the 11:20 am show at Loew's at the Fountains theatre #8 which is one of the very small venues with only one set of stairs. There were a total of six of us. Very intimate.
The story opens with James Garner as Duke reading from a notebook to Gena Rowlands who is a resident in an elderly care facility. We then flashback to June 1940 and the introduction of two teens - Noah (Ryan Gosling) and Allie (Rachel McAdams) who fall madly in love. But there are problems: he is the poor country boy and she is the rich sophisticated city girl. But he reads poetry and she paints; they have a summer love with candles, dancing, moonlight, shared dreams, and the fruits of a first love experience.
Her parents don't like the poor kid not a bit and whisk her off away from the dashing yet unacceptable Noah. Hearts are broken, miscommunications prevail, World War II intervenes and we have a seven year separation. Allie meets another wonderful man and falls in love and is about to get married. But she has never forgotten her love for Noah and must see him one more time before she marries. Uh oh, sounds like a dilemma.
I have not properly described this deeply wonderful love story. It is the greatest romance since Leo DeCaprio and Kate Winslet hooked up in "Titanic" in 1997. This love story is in the class with James Dean and Natalie Wood...Tracey and Hepburn...Bogart's Charlie Allnut and Hepburn's Rosie "Ol Girl" Sayer in the "African Queen."
The acting was magnificent. My short list for nominations now includes Garner, Rowlands, Gosling, McAdams, and Joan Allen for her portrayal of Allie's snooty, sensitive mother. Other nominations should include the screenplay adapted from the novel by Nicholas Sparks and direction by Nick Cassevetes.
I did not shed a tear until an hour and ten minutes into this movie and then it got worse. I had so many tears toward the end that I was afraid one of the other five might think I was a girlie man. I'm glad I did not see this movie with the love of my life (Monique H.) or the emotional damage would have been overwhelming. Monique wanted to see this movie so I will re-offer to take her but I know she will cry like a baby...not that there's anything wrong with that. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 94. Larry H. DOB: July 16, 1950
Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
It was the best of times and the worst of times. This movie is dumb as a board, but it has some belly laughs. I laughed so hard once that some Mr. Pibb went up my nose. But I was also glad when it seemed that the movie was almost over so I could get the heck out of the theatre and start my weekend. The movie is only 90 minutes.
Will Ferrell plays Ron Burgundy - a 1970's chauvinist, egomaniac TV anchorman in San Diego. Christina Applegate is perfect as the wannabe co-anchorman/person trying to break into the TV news world dominated by men. Every stereotypical joke ever imagined about sexual roles and the silly seventies was rolled out by Farrell and his co-writer/director Adam McKay. Some of the writing was clever and stirred interest but boredom set in around the 45 minute mark. The audience of about 25, however, laughed at most of the potty humor. The whole show was a one-liner. There is no pretense of social value. The script has the seriousness of an Austin Powers movie - not there's anything wrong with that.
I wanted to see a light-hearted movie but this had no heart; not even a faint pulse. Ok, I laughed more than I should have and I am certain that wardrobe used some of my old college photos as hair and clothes models. And I knew all the "I am Woman" characters. Now don't push me, but I might have acted a little goofy in the 70's and said a few things about women not unlike Ron Burgundy. But I was never arrested for anything serious. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 74. Larry H.
I want to be Spider Man. "There is a little hero in all of us..." so says Spider Man's aunt. But a little is not enough; I want to be a super hero!
Such is the trek of a fan of Spider Man. Or maybe it's just the guys with big egos. I don't know and I don't care - I want to be a super hero...and dat gummit I am one. Monique H. thinks I'm a super hero.
After those first two paragraphs, I'm worn out. I have just returned from Loew's at the Fountains where S-M 2 is showing every half hour and since it sold 40.5 million dollars worth of tickets on opening day Wednesday June 30th, one would have to assume that "mega hit" is an understatement.
Tobey Maguire returns as our hero and is still in love with M. J. Watson (Kirsten Dunst) but cannot express his love for to do so would expose MJ to danger from Spider Man's enemies. Such unexpressed love can cause a young man (even one with super hero tendencies) to become lonely and depressed. The boy had issues. And some career choices.
Meanwhile, we have a new villain (Albert "Frida" Molina) that is the proverbial mad scientist who wants to develop a fusion project that has more energy than the sun. Oh my, think something might go wrong? Molina's character has four very large mechanical arms that resemble the shape of the worms from "Tremors." I know what you are thinking - but Kevin Bacon is not in this flick. Now back to the movie, Molina is perfect. I knew this movie was cookin' and that Director Sam Raimi was on target when I found that I was relating to the bad guy as much as Spider Man.
This is a fun movie with excellent acting, story and special effects. I found the action too slow for me while Spidey was going through his identity crisis during the middle of the movie, but the beginning and end are dynamite. I was already contemplating Spider-Man 3 as I walked out of the theatre. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 90. Larry H.
Michael Moore wrote, produced, and directed this film. He also appears in it as the narrator and occasional interviewer/actor. Moore has made a movie that will be much talked about, cussed and discussed. His objective was to question the legitimacy of the war in Iraq and rip George W. Bush. From a moviemaker's perspective, he did a good job on both counts.
I would call this movie a "mockumentary" rather than a "documentary." Moore poked fun and ridiculed the Bush Administration throughout. The audience was about 125-150 folks which is a shockingly large crowd for this sort of movie showing at noon on a rainy Friday. The audience laughed often.
My primary emotions were boredom and sadness. I did not learn anything of significance so my mind wandered and I looked at my watch periodically. On the other hand, when I saw the death and blood of the war, I winced. When I saw a grieving mother, I mourned. I felt compelled to see this movie because of the controversy and subject matter, but I'm all about entertainment on a Friday afternoon and this was a bust in that category. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 73. Larry H.
Viktor Navorski is from Karkozhia, a country somewhere in Europe near Russia. There has been a military coup so the US no longer recognizes Karkozhia as a legitimate nation thus stranding the hapless Viktor in JFK terminal until his visa is approved etc. Of course, this is a major snafu since Viktor's country in essence does not exist. Don't let this silly premise bog you down.
Tom Hanks plays Viktor with an accent worthy of an actor that is playing a caricature more than a character. The director is Steven as in Spielberg so I am assuming that Hanks played it the way Steven instructed him. At first I thought Hanks just didn't get it and had a bad accent and figured he'd just wing it. Not true cinema breath! Hanks once again demonstrates his genius when teaming with Spielberg, but it took me most of the movie to buy into basically an unbelievable, farcical plot.
Then the Spielberg magic happened. I no longer cared about the believability of the story or its setting, but care about the characters. About two thirds into the movie, I noticed a salty discharge from one of my eyes. Being the deep thinker that I am, I pondered aloud "...what is this... surely I don't care about this simple movie with editorial comments about American society as seen through the eyes of an immigrant with the naiveté of Andy Kaufman's Latka Gravas and the charm of Jimmy Stewart in "It's a Wonderful Life"." Then I noticed the salty discharge 4 or 5 more times and I realized that Spielberg had tricked me into being wooed by these loveable characters and touching story about, family, commitment, and the truly American characteristic: pulling for the underdog.
Stanley Tucci plays the bad guy; not really because he too is loveable and sweet in his own Home Security-follow-the-rules kind of way. Viktor makes many friends while "living" in the terminal and the plot thickens as his English slightly improves. And you ask, please don't tell me that a poor immigrant that shaves in the bathroom and sleeps at Gate 67 while it is under construction gets the girl and she is none other than a flight attendant that looks just like Catherine Zeta-Jones. Ok, I'm not going to reveal any more to you, but the music of John Williams is constantly in the background. Shoot, I think I could make a successful movie if John Williams would be my musical director. That Spielberg gets all the breaks. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 92. Larry H.
Just before I walked out of my suburban home that is on a cul-de-sac with manicured lawns, I reminded my beautiful wife that I planned to see "The Stepford Wives" and she requested that I pay particular attention to the plot and perhaps take notes so she could learn from my experience. I gently took her left hand into my right and looked into her pretty blue eyes and said "...no, Pumpkin, it wouldn't be right for you to change...I really respect your strong opinions and feministic attitudes held over from the 60's."
Even though I did not take notes, I will attempt to share some of my thoughts. This 2004 version/update of the 1975 saga of robot-like wives takes place in Connecticut in the town named "Stepford." Because we are familiar with the basic concept of "wives programmed to be subservient and housewife slaves" for their husbands, Director Frank Oz takes the fantasy to another level of gender comment but it is still the same silly story with a few twists.
The cast is worth the price of a ticket. Nicole Kidman is a recently fired TV executive who goes nuts and needs electro-shock; she is married to Matthew Broderick who invented the deadpan expression and can look good with a gator shirt. They move out of the city to get a fresh start and think that a seemingly perfect town in Connecticut will be the answer to their dysfunction. Bette Midler is an over-the-top Jewish author married to Jon Lovitz; gotta love that. And here is the jewel: Glenn Close married to Christopher Walken. All the wives wear plastic smiles and dresses right out of the closet of Mrs. Ward Cleaver.
The screenplay has its clever moments but even the surprises are predictable. But you can't hide the talent of great actors and this cast delivers the goods even though the plot is worn out. We all need a little fantasy in our lives; kind of like the first paragraph of this piece. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 86. Larry H.
I had to attend the four o'clock showing of this opening day disaster flick. Monique H. got into my business again and slowed me down. I don't like change; last week I had to work Friday afternoon until 6:00 pm. Now that's cruel and unusual punishment so I was determined to make it to the flicks today even if I had to attend with 150 other folks that were trying to get their Memorial Day holiday started early.
I deserve to be at the theatre by noon but I do admit that the bigger crowds are interesting. The guy sitting two seats to my right did not wake up until we were 1 hour and 40 minutes into it. I kid you not; I was pulling for him to sleep until the closing credits. And a young woman with a phone that had many blue lights answered her phone during a particularly quite moment of the movie and in a loud clear voice said "...hello..." I sent her my best "shut-up" look; she did not see me but I sent her my vibes anyway.
And now the movie...what a disaster...no, I mean the movie. The story is a formula big budget disaster movie patterned after all the other disaster movies you've seen. But this one is not very good. Dennis Quaid as Prof. Hall figures out that there will be a major climate shift on earth in perhaps "... a hundred or even a thousand years." Oops. Mother Nature goes crazy almost immediately with many tornadoes in Los Angeles and heavy snow in New Delhi. And that's just the beginning. Massive flooding and "Ice Age" in the Northern Hemisphere. Supposedly we had enough character development to care about the plot but I didn't care if they lived or died. The primary rescue was unbelievable and unnecessary.
But I will give Director/Co-Writer Richard Emmerich props on atmosphere and special effects. This is the coldest movie since "Ice Station Zebra." I was so glad when this thing was over so I could go outside in the good 'ole Gulf Coast heat. And that, my friends, was the highlight of my experience. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 71. Larry H.
This is opening day and also a Wednesday which was quite confusing for me. Got caught off guard; still had my Friday mindset. So about 12:45 PM, I told the staff that I was going to check on the mail and that it might take a while. I was back at the office by 2:45 PM... with the mail. No one noticed my absence.
When the original "Shrek" was still in local theatres, Pastor Tom P. announced from the pulpit that it was one of the best movies ever made. When it comes to family values and love, he's just an old softy. But I do not give sermons in his pulpit so perhaps he should leave the movie comments to those of us that might be better trained. "Not that there's anything wrong with that."
Sequels can be tricky for a moviemaker, but Co-director and Co-screenwriter Andrew Adamson seems to have the hang of it. The only strong aspects of this movie are: the story, music, voices, set design, script, and oh yeah, the animation. If you liked "Shrek" you will love "Shrek 2." Fresh, clever, and innovative.
The voices of Mike Myers (Shrek), Eddie Murphy (Donkey), Cameron Diaz (Fiona), Julie Andrews, Antonio Banderas, and John Cleese are dead on the mark. Myers and Murphy shine as the stars. The basic feel-good of good over evil and "beauty is not skin deep" themes still carry this tale that takes us to the land of Far, Far, Away to meet the King (Cleese)and Queen (Andrews)who are Princess Fiona's parents. They are eager to meet their daughter's new husband, and they are "mildly" shocked that he does not look like a Prince Charming but looks just like...well, an ogre. Likewise, our loveable ogre Shrek just back from his honeymoon with Fiona is none too happy to meet his in-laws and rejection. Throw in a conniving Fairy Godmother with a stash of potions and you have the right mix for disaster for the newlyweds.
This is an important movie because it takes animation to a new level and it is going to make ca-gillion dollars. Will there be a "Shrek 3"? Duh. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 90. Larry H.
Why did Larry H. choose this movie?
1. I thought the Olsen Twins might think highly of me and give me some of their money.
2. I've seen Mary-Kate and Ashley on about five talk shows lately and they were starting to grow on me.
3. There are not many good movies in current release and vampires ("Van Helsing") creep me out.
4. Co-stars Eugene Levy, Darrell Hammond, Andy Richter, and Andrea Martin are very funny...not in this movie, but other stuff.
5. I needed to see an early movie because I have been asked to attend the NASCAR Elite Series Southeast this evening at Houston Motorsports Park and then must shoot in a pistol contest Saturday morning in Brazoria County so I needed a noon movie to get my weekend started appropriately.
6. I was trying to be clever and catch a "sleeper" movie so I would have something to write about and you people would think I was hip and adventurous for seeing a teenager movie; turns out the only sleeper was seated on Row 10 - Larry H. (and the other four losers in Theatre #12.)
7. I thought Mabel H. my 82 year old dear, sweet mother would be proud of her baby boy for doing the right thing and supporting a movie about life in New York. Happy Mother's Day!
8. I needed some popcorn.
Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 69 W. Larry H. May 7, 2004
I am home now. Did not get a chance to follow my normal routine of writing these comments immediately upon returning to the office to wind down my week. It is suppertime and I have not eaten and I think I might be getting a little cranky. Monique H. wants to go for Mexican food; I'm can do a taco.
"Man on Fire" came out last week but I'm just getting the opportunity to check out Denzel Washington in his latest suspense drama directed by Tony Scott (Ridley's little brother). He plays a washed-up guy with a shady past that he fears was so terrible that "God will not forgive him." Denzel's character is John W. Creasy who has a close personal relationship with Jack Daniels and is so unstable that he needs his friend to get him a job as a bodyguard for a young Mexican girl. He's so unstable that Christopher Walken plays the solid citizen; ain't that scary.
In the opening scene, we are informed that there are many kidnappings occurring daily in Latin American. Creasy bonds with the little girl and the family and sure enough there is a botched kidnapping involving a shootout with much confusion about the whereabouts of the $10 million ransom.
The first part of the movie was boring, but then Denzel goes Uma on the Mexican Mafia and starts shooting folks in the temple at point blank range in a one-man attempt to seek revenge for the kidnapping of "Pita." If you do not have a healthy respect for a good Glock pistol and some C4 explosives, then go see "Laws of Attraction" starring Pierce Brosnan. Even with this relatively simple film of violence and blood, Denzel shows once again that he is a superb actor and worthy of the title of Movie Star. I bought into the action and was totally pulling for Denzel to save the day. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 88. Larry H. April 30, 2004
Please keep all my comments on the QT. As in Quentin Tarantino. I know that's hokey, but once I thought of it I couldn't stop myself. And this is definitely a QT movie; schizophrenic and weird are the first words that come to mind. Violent, bizarre, and disjointed also seem appropriate.
Uma Thurman returns from the first "Kill Bill- Vol.1" to play the baddest ex-murderer in the whole world. She's has the marshal arts skill of a kung fu fighter, the toughness of Cool Hand Luke, and the killing efficiency of Dirty Harry. And Bill has done her wrong and she wants revenge which means her one and only purpose in life is to Kill Bill.
Footnote 1: I barely got to my seat in Loew's theatre 9 before the movie started. The crowd was small, but I accidentally sat in front of a couple; the man was directly behind me. He repeatedly "kicked" my chair during the movie and I was getting quite irritated and considered saying something or maybe going Uma on him.
This movie had some very highs and lows; immensely entertaining and capturing my attention then I would wander off into boredom. That's the QT factor that we have come to expect from Tarantino. But one of the highlights is the acting by David Carradine as the "murdering bastard" Bill. He is easily my early favorite as Best Supporting Actor
Footnote 2: As the closing credits were rolling, I could hear the guy behind me getting up. I was still seated as he walked by me. He was about 25 with a clean shaven head, cap turned backwards, and biceps that reminded me of L A Laker Karl Malone. I paused and thought "What would Jesus do?" And I just let it go. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 82. Larry H. April 23, 2004 Go Rockets!
I was very excited about seeing this movie. The house lights in Loew's theatre #18 began flickering during the previews; I took that as a bad omen.
The battle of The Alamo and the Texians fight for independence from Mexico is one of the great stories of human history. This movie was not worthy. I should have known that we were in trouble when Ron "Opie" Howard dropped out of the project even though he is credited as a Producer (not an Executive Producer.) This latest version of The Alamo needed Opie as director not John Lee Hancock. Director Hancock made a workmanlike movie and skillfully told the story, but that's not good enough. This story deserves greatness.
The cast of Billy Bob Thornton as Davey ("call me David") Crockett, and ...ah heck, I don't even want to spend the energy to tell you about the other actors. Okay, Dennis Quaid was a good General Sam Houston.
Just to give you an idea of my reaction to this movie, I took a bathroom break about an hour into it and bought some Milk Duds for a pick-me-up. Some of you people will like this flick, but for me "...Give me Victory...or give me my money back!" Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 75. Larry H. Happy Good Friday - April 9, 2004
It's the beginning of spring and I'm all about love and adventure so I invited Monique H. to attend the movie with me. She has shown remarkable restraint during recent movies and minimized her penchant for untimely chatter. However, on this fine day she did challenge my application of "excessive" butter on MY popcorn. Then she wanted to pick the seats. I can't live like this!
This movie is uneventful and forgettable, but at times hilarious. Monique H. and I tried to outdo each other with belly laughs. Tom Hanks as a caricature of a fake Southern gentleman and his band of idiots are trying to rob a Mississippi casino via a tunnel dug from the root cellar of an old woman (Irma P. Hall). Ms. Hall's rendition of a sweet black woman who believes in the good book and warns "...not to be tried and found wanting" is memorable. This is a Joel and Ethan Coen movie which is, by definition, different, which is also refreshing in a cookie cutter Hollywood mentality. Marlon Wayans as one of the bandits will be the big winner as a result of his performance as a jive talkin', edgy gangsta wannabe.
Like the cashier girlfriend of Jerry Seinfeld explained "...your act just didn't do it for me...it was just so much fluff." Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 86. Larry H. March 26, 2004
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
I was hoping to get out of this movie in time to pick up Monique H. at 2:30 pm. The ticket sales attendant told me that the movie would end shortly after 2:00 pm so I figured that my date with Monique H. was secure. It is now 1:40 pm and I am back at the office typing these comments. Now how can that be?
The screenplay for this movie was written by Charlie Kaufman who also wrote "Being John Malkovich" which was genius. I like the entire cast: Jim Carrey, Kate Winslet, Kirsten Dunst, Elijah Wood and Tom Wilkinson. So what could go wrong?
This is a movie about disjointed, goofy love and having one's memory erased which is quite vogue in movies this year. Weird but true. Kaufman and Director Michael Condry present this movie as though the audience's brain is on drugs or has recently turned into scramble eggs. Personally, I have no problem with that concept. However, I found that I was actually following the story and did not give a dat gum about the characters.
My first clue should have been when I tried to buy my ticket and could not remember the name of the movie so I just mumbled "...you know, the Jim Carrey movie." Clue #2: When I arrive in theatre #11 shortly before the movie began and quickly realized that I was the only living soul in attendance which can be cool but made me start wondering what you people knew that I didn't know. Clue #3: the popcorn tasted too salty.
What's a boy to do? At about the 45 minute mark, I boogied. Question: is there really a movie if no one is in the theatre? Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 69 W. Larry H. March 19, 2004
NASCAR 3D: The IMAX Experience
I had to look at a map to locate Marq E IMAX which is part of the Entertainment Center and shopping mall near Silber and the Katy Freeway. The complex has 23 theatres and many cool stores. My favorite store is the Funkyard. Café Adobe and Wings and More are located within 100 feet of the front door of the Edwards Theatre complex.
I showed up at theatre #23 a few minutes after 1:00 pm and was requested to show my $10 ticket stub in order to get the giant sunglass-looking 3D glasses. There were no movie trailers; boom and we're off to the races...literally.
This "movie" is sponsored and produced in association with NASCAR. There is no real character development other than brief highlights and interviews of some of the big names of the sport. An example was early in the show Michael Waltrip and brother Darrell Waltrip (aka D W) are shown doing some of their shtick...and then a close-up of D W the Fox TV announcer with joyful tears in his eyes because Mikey had just won the Daytona 500 ...we can barely hear DW utter the words "...I hope Earnhardt is alright." But we know Dale Earnhardt ("The Intimidator") died in that 2001 Daytona crash about the same time Mikey was crossing the start/finish line for his emotional Daytona 500 victory.
The IMAX sound and special effects are spectacular. More than once I ducked because I thought a $389.00 Goodyear tire was coming off the screen and hit me right up side my head. I could feel the G force of the 800 HP engine making a tight turn into a 31 degree bank. The camera shots put the audience in the driver's seat and behind the scenes as well as in the pits with the crews. Appearance by Jeff Gordon, Jimmie Johnson, Ryan Newman, Dale Earnhardt Jr., Mark Martin and others are all part of the show...and I was loving every minute of it. My only disappointment was that the movie was over too quickly - 48 minutes.
I'm going to my first NASCAR race in April at Texas Motor Speedway. Look for me; I'll be the guy wearing the Michael Waltrip hat and shirt. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade A. Larry H.
I've been having a good week and I chose wisely today. This is a movie made from the TV show of the same name circa 1970's. I thought I was "right on" in the 70's because I was young and bullet proof. Watching this movie was a ride down memory lane and it was fun ...er, I mean groovy...far out man!
I started laughing in the opening scene and never stopped. Ben Stiller as Starsky and Owen "Nose" Wilson as Hutch are perfect. If this was not a stupid movie they would be up for Academy Awards and the script and music would be a slam dunk, I mean outta sight.
The plot is unimportant. Two 70's undercover cops trying to catch bad guys while driving a dy-no-mite Ford Gran Torino with a custom paint job just like the car from the TV series. Click http://starskytorino.com/index.html. The costumes, including hairdos, lingo, and set design were boss. Our charming heroes are trying to nab a drug kingpin (Vince Vaughn) and somehow Starsky accidentally ingests some potent cocaine and challenges another disco daddy to a dance contest. After his binge, Starsky mellows out while Hutch goes psychedelic with a couple of foxes. I'm smiling just thinking about it.
There was a crowd of about 25 which is pretty big for an 11:10 am start time. I predict box office success and numerous sequels. Check ya later...see ya on the flipside.
Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 89. Larry H.
As I entered Loew's parking lot for the second time today, there were many more cars than mid morning. When I entered theatre 18 for the noon showing of "The Passion of the Christ" I was shocked at the size of the crowd. Fifteen minutes before the show began, there were hundreds of people already in their seats. I grabbed an unoccupied seat on the top row and in the corner. Shortly before the movie began, folks were hunting for seats and had trouble finding two seats together unless they were willing to sit "down front."
The movie opened with Jesus painfully praying in the Garden of Gethsemane while Peter and the boys have fallen asleep. Meanwhile Judas is getting his silver for the betrayal. From the very start I knew I was about to see a very accurate and emotional movie. Director/Co-Screenwriter Mel Gibson grabbed the audience quickly and began to tell the story of the last twelve hours of Jesus' life. This is Gibson's version of the books of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John. I am familiar with the original script and appreciate Gibson's close following of the biblical account albeit there are some Hollywood-added dialogue but precious few. This movie is intense, powerful, and fair.
The brutality and cruelty suffered by Jesus is monumental, but I did not ever get the impression that it was done for any other reason than accuracy. Torture through beating, flogging, and especially scourging is devastating. There are numerous close-ups of blood and ripped flesh but the audience did not turn their heads; they remained quiet and reverent with perhaps a few sobs of emotion.
Gibson developed the characters of Jesus, Caiaphas, Pilate, Herod and Mary Mother of Jesus in a manner that made the movie believable and generated audience empathy. Such stories as Peter's denials and the carrying of the cross for Jesus by Simon of Cyrene were also covered but the hatred and brutality by the Roman soldiers was dominant. Anti Jewish? No.
Maia Morgenstern as Mary, the Mother of Jesus, was outstanding. The performance by James Caviezel as Jesus was difficult to fully appreciate because of the blood, special effects, and makeup but I thought he was excellent. The music by John Debney was superb. The cinematography, sound and set design were first class.
This movie is like going to Boot Camp; I'm glad I went through it once but I don't want to do it again for a while. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 95. Larry H.
Note: I returned to the theatre for the noon showing. I decided to go earlier than normal since things appeared to be a little off at Loew's. As I handed my previously purchased ticket to the young man, I asked him if there were any more problems with the schedule. He hung his head and meekly mumbled that he was there just to tear the ticket and return the stub..."but I know we got the rest of our prints about 15 minutes ago." I guess the big border heist in Canada is over. Whew!
Once again my timing was off this beautiful Friday afternoon. Went to see my shotgun gunsmith "Napalm Nate" and could not make it to the movies until 1:25 pm and so I had to go to AMC First Colony. AMC is not a bad theatre but they do not have assigned/reserved parking for Larry H. similar to Loew's.
This movie is Ray Romano's big-screen acting debut and Gene Hackman's one millionth film so it all evened out. Raymond, which is what his TV momma calls him and so do I, plays a plumber in a small New England town which has a pet moose living on a downtown street. And everybody says hello to everybody or is it "hey" kinda like they did where Andy and Barney lived. This movie is actually Mayberry meets Newhart.
Raymond's character is named Harold "Handy" Harrison who has been dating the local cute veterinarian for six years. She is ready for a commitment but Handy just wants a new pickup. Meanwhile President Monroe "Eagle" Cole (Hackman) who is recently divorced and leaving office after two very successful terms is moving to Mooseport. The former Prez is drafted by the local council to run for mayor and unbeknownst to everyone, Raymond is also running. And the real fight is over the vet (Maura Tierney). Marcia Gay Harden and Fred "Don't Call Me Moley" Savage are the President's assistants.
The town council has several of Mayberry's Floyd, Goober, and Gomer who get some good one-liners; at least I laughed with a half-baked throaty chortle. Raymond is assisted by a couple of his employees that are Aunt Bea reincarnated. The characters of Andy, Barney, and Bob float in and out for flavor.
This movie almost rises to "average" midway but does not actually climb out of the doldrums until the end when I realized that I cared about these characters a little bit. Ray Romano's charm will save him but if he does another stinker we will have to talk. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 79. Larry H.
I actually saw this movie a week ago and just now getting up the energy to write about it. It sapped my enthusiasm during the 20-25 minutes that I invested in it. I was going to let it slide but since it has been at the top of the box-office sales, I had to share.
Don't go see this movie! It is poorly written, directed and acted; other than that, it is a really bang-up flick. Worse yet, it is not funny. This movie/screenplay would be rejected by Saturday Night Live for a five minute sketch. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 65 W. Larry H.
I'm trying real hard to make my vote for the Academy Awards one of intelligence and first hand experience so I am going to the movies with important nominations. And such a task can be painful.
In order to see this Super Bowl Eve moving, I had to travel to West Oaks Mall at the Alamo Drafthouse Cinema which serves beer and wine and will deliver food and drinks to you at your seat in the theatre. The seats are separated by a bar type table that extends the length of the row. Wait staff are circling during the movie to pick up orders that the customers write on a piece of paper and place on a clip on the "table" in front of them. I bought my popcorn and DP before entering but I was intrigued by this arrangement that "...started in Austin...and we are hoping it catches on in the Houston area...," said the young man at the full-blown bar adjacent to the ticket counter. The long tables between the seats provide extra leg room as a by-product.
Naomi Watts and Bencio Del Toro are nominated for their parts in this movie and Sean Penn also has a starring role. I walked out after about twenty minutes (at least I finished my popcorn). Everyone in the movie is dying or recovering from drugs and/or crime. The scenes are a helter-skelter collection of flash forwards and backwards for no apparent reason. Perhaps the director pulls it all together in the end and the audience ultimately understands the point of the story, but I didn't care then and I don't care now, so don't bother contacting me and saying what a great ending it had. It is a low budget movie for good reason; smart people did not want to part with their money to invest in this piece of crap.
I read a review of this movie which explained that the "21 Grams" refers to the amount of weight a person loses when they die. I thought it was the amount of cocaine consumed by the director during the making of the film so I'm glad I got that straight. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 65W. Larry H.
I have not been to a movie in three weeks; I am due a sweet ride at the flicks at my appointed time on Fridays. I chose "Monster" today to check out the performance of recently nominated Charlize Theron. I wished I would have seen "The Cooler." Oh, stop being such a baby. Takes one to know one. I apologize for this outburst, but I am still a little shell shocked from sitting though two hours of the horror of this "based on a true story" movie.
The beautiful Ms. Theron has already won the Golden Globe for Best Actress but all the voters are foreigners so I never know if they know what they are talking/voting about. They're not from around here, you know. Well, I guess they know this time. Theron's performance was so convincing that I will probably have nightmares. She plays a prostitute who is in love with a young woman and kills her johns for small amounts of cash and their car. And she has little remorse and a lot of torment...and looks like the devil.
Eileen is the memorable character that seems to have either a beer, cigarette or man in her hands at all times. The intensity, hate, and sadness produced by Theron were almost too powerful. I did not enjoy the movie and I was glad when it was over. If I saw a movie like this in the 60's, I might have been arrested. This movie is full of violence, sex, and decadence.
I plan to next see a funny movie or at the very least a stupid one. This movie wore me out; it literally made me sick to my stomach. And I'm a pro! I do not want to talk about this movie or ever see it again. I do not want anyone to watch it in my home or near where I reside...ever! Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 75. Larry H.
A clash of cultures and characters. Kathy (Jennifer Connelly) is unexpectedly and erroneously evicted from her Northern California family homestead. The county promptly sells the small house that she inherited from her father to the family of Massoud Behrani (Ben Kingsley) who is a former Colonel in the Iranian Air Force.
Kathy is a person in recovery from addictions and is separated from her husband; she is alone and devastated that she has lost the one thing that kept her life glued together - the house. Colonel Behrani is a proud man who has bought the house in good faith and will be able to sell it for a very large profit which he intends to use for his son's college education and to provide for his wife in a fashion appropriate for a family of their former standing in Iran. Kathy ends up living in her car and hooks up with a Deputy Sheriff (Rod Eldard) that is trapped in a loveless marriage and eager to help Kathy regain the house while earning her gratitude and love. Kathy confronts the Behrani family unsuccessfully and then the Deputy gets involved. The action and emotions escalate rapidly and fiercely.
The film is based on the novel by Andre Dubus III, directed by first-timer Vadim Perelman, and distributed by Dreamworks. It is a masterpiece; one of the most emotional movie trips I've taken in a long time. I cried and sweated. I was drained because of the superb character development. I was pulling for and against every character which is the mark of a complicated and masterful movie. The acting by Connelly and Kingsley was stunning. The cast of Shohreh Aghdashloo, the colonel's wife Nadi, Jonathan Ahdout the teenage son Esmail, and Rod Eldard as the deputy were outstanding.
This is the movie that will receive numerous nominations and many will claim they never heard of it. But you have been warned. Do not go to this movie unless you are spiritually in a good place and can take a responsible adult with you. It will tear your heart out if you have one. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 95. Larry H.
Happy New Year. This year I'm going to hate less. So I decided I could muster the courage to see a Diane Keaton movie. And in another act of good faith toward all men I invited Monique H. and Eric H. to accompany me. The movie started at 11:15 am which caused a bit of a stir for the 17 year old boy since it was so early. Seems he had a good time last night. We managed to make it in time for the beginning credits but we had to eat breakfast at Loew's. Not recommended but we managed all four food groups.
I really went to this flick because 1) it's what I do on New Year's Day 2) I love Jack Nicholson 3) and I wanted to prove that I could set aside my prejudices against others and enjoy a nice movie in spite of personal feelings toward a particular actress...or actor.
Jack plays Harry a 63 year old rich playboy who has never been married and dates only young babes. Not much of a stretch for our sunglasses-wearing Jack. Ms. Keaton is Erica the uptight successful playwright that has a beautiful home in the Hamptons. Harry was dating Erica's young daughter (Amanda Peet) and having a weekend fling at the beach house. Unfortunately, the fifty-something divorced Erica and her sister (Frances "Fargo" McDormand) also show up and the awkwardness begins. Erica is horrified that this older man is dating her daughter.
Harry and the daughter are about to make whoopee when he has a heart attack and ends up on the bedroom floor. This is about 15 minutes into the film. Erica, Ms. Keaton, attempts to resuscitate Harry by administering mouth to mouth. And I hoped Harry would die right on the spot. I hate Diane Keaton and I couldn't hide my feelings any longer. I leaned over to Eric H. and started mocking the movie and poking him while making appropriately pithy comments. At the twenty minute mark, I suggested to the fam that we walk and catch "Cheaper By The Dozen." Monique H. did not like that idea. I suggested that Eric and I could meet her in the lobby at 1:30 pm and she did not like that idea either. We watched the whole movie.
Jack is great in the movie in his usual cool way. The movie is clever and well directed by Nancy Meyers who also wrote it. Monique H. commented that the movie would have been a good "made for TV movie." Eric H. commented that he would never go to another movie with the two of us. I will continue to work on my personal issues. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 80. Larry H.
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