Larry H's Movie Reviews for 1997
Index of Movies:
The Boxer | Wag the Dog | Good Will Hunting | The Postman | Jackie Brown | For Richer Or Poorer | Titanic | As Good As It Gets | Home Alone 3 | Amistad | George of the Jungle | Air Force One | Conspiracy Theory | Ulee's Gold | Cop Land | Flubber | Starship Troopers | The Man Who Knew Too Little | Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil | Rainmaker | Mr Bean | The Jackal | Mad City | Boogie Nights | Most Wanted | Seven Years in Tibet | Kiss the Girls | Peacemaker | In and Out | L A Confidential | The Full Monty | The Game | GI Jane | Money Talks
"Cop Land" opened today/Friday August 15th, 1997. I saw it at theatre #17 at Loews.
Seating capacity: 681 (23 in attendance)Starring: Sylvester Stallone as Sheriff Freddie
Harvey Keitel as Ray the crooked cop tied into the Mafia
Robert "Bobby" DeNiro as an Internal Affairs cop from NYPD
Ray Liotta as a cokehead copWhat a waste of talent! This was suppose to be Sly's coming out party as a serious actor. OK, so he came out a little bit. He tried and did not overact, which must have been powerful tempting for him, so we give him a B-. Advice - go back where you belong and do not get on the screen anywhere near Bobby and Harvey ever again. Now get out of here.
Bobby (his friends call him "Bobby") is still the king (no offense Elvis, which by the way, Elvis is not dead) and Harvey K. is playing another "Mr Wolfe" character as a fixer of problems; he had better luck in "Pulp Fiction" than he did in C L in the problem solving area. Harvey and Bobby are the only bright spots in the movie. Sly plays a slow moving, hard of hearing sheriff that doesn't say much. Oh duh. As sheriff, he is a dupe to the dopes. Also has a nasty cut on his nose to make hiim "believable". Director/writer James Mangold must take us as big of a chump as Sheriff Freddie. Whats with the "cuts on the nose" lateley on the big screen? Two weeks in a row we have had to endure these bloody rips on the snozolla. I don't get it.
The movie ended much to my liking except too many of these bozos lived. The guns were acceptable except Sheriff Freddie even carried a chump revolver when we all know cool cops only carry automatics, so I give Mangold a plus for that uncool prop for Sheriff Freddie. There are no good guys. As close as we can come to a good guy(s) is guilty of petty theft, drunk driving, lying, adultry, bombing, murder (accidentally), and cocaine addiction. "Where have all the flowers gone?"
This movie does for cops what Kramer's attorney Jackie does for lawyers. The preceding sentence is too much of a stretch for this piece, but I just had to work in Kramer and Jackie because last night they were so funny on "Sienfeld" that I thought the wife would have to call 911.
Picky detail that irked me: Sheriff Freddie shoots right, smokes and writes righthanded, but his watch is on his right wrist. Reason: Sly is lefthanded in real life and normally wears his watch on his right wrist. Wake up Mr. Mangold. Ray the cokehead smokes lefthanded and his watch is on his right wrist appropriately. Please note that Ray shoots righthanded because Hollywood does not like lefthanded people. I am lefthanded and I am gettin ticked off writing this and I am seriously considering bringing a lawsuit against all the righthanded majority for discrimination and back pay or is that payback?
Grade 79 Larry H.
Starring Robin Williams as Professor Phillip Brainard in the ramake of Disney's 1961 classic "The Absent Minded Professor". The professor is lucky with inventions in chemistry such as the wonderful gravity defying flubber, but the boy is unlucky in love. Forgot to show up at his own wedding three times. Hey, he was busy doing real important stuff. His intended, Sara, was not laughing, even though she was the President of the college that employed Professor Brainard.
I attended this movie Friday after Thanksgiving @ 5:15 pm with the wife and 11 year old son. New experience: I sat in the back row in stadium seating (capacity 391) in the left corner against the wall. Gave me a sense of power because I knew no one could slip up on me. Crowd big, kids laughed and giggled every time they were suppose to which says a lot about this "kids" movie. If you are an ole fart and do not like silly and slapstick, don't go. Or get your own kid or rent one and go see a light hearted comedy that does not pretend to be anything other than Robin Williams being nutty and folks jumping to the top of the gym in a single leap or a bowling ball bouncing for days.
In 1961, I was eleven. Hmmmmm. I loved Fred McMurry as the "Absent Minded Professor". Cars flying still catch my fancy. I am giving this movie ten extra points because the kids in attendance laughed heartily. Rock 'n Roll
Grade 80. Larry H
"Starship Troopers" Stars: none Starring: sci-fi deluxe. This is a fun movie. I am not even a Trekkie and I liked this film from beginning to end. When the fighting finally starts, I am ready to "kick bug butt". You see the bad guys are bugs. I am not kidding. However, this satirical flick accomplishes the difficult by convincing the viewer that the bugs have killed a lot of humans(millions) so our heroes must do what is necessary to save mankind. "If you find a bug hole, nuke it". Now that kind of a line is hard to come by.
We are treated to some wonderfully fresh faces as heroes. We are introduced to them while they are seniors in high school trying to decide if they will go into "Federal Service" and become a "citizen" or take the wimp way out and become a mundane "civilian" and go to college. These young heroes are so handsome; perfect teeth and smooth skin. "Let's make a vow to always be friends even though we may be a million light years away" they proclaim as three of the heroes graduate from high school. The training for Mobile Troopers is rigorous not unlike the tribulations of "G I Jane" and the mystery of who will take the walk down "Wash Out Lane"? While in training, we learn that men and women are treated equally and shower together as though it was common place. The scene of all these young, hard bodies sharing jokes and soap in the barracks shower comes to mind. I digress. The main weapon of the infantry is a M-16 on steroids that will deliver major fire power, but the bugs can take hundreds of hits without going down.
Its nice to know that generations into the future will still involve love triangles and fights among young men who want the same woman. I liked these people and was very sad when bugs killed some of the lesser heroes. If the movie was made in the 1950s, John Wayne would have been the infintry hero and Maureen O'hara would have been a hotshot pilot. Passion, aggression, duty, challenge, love, failure, death, victory, defeat, sadness, jubilation. Doogie Howser, M.D.(Neil Patrick Harris) and Jake Busey who has to be the son of Gary Busey because his country bumpkin schtick and big teeth are a dead giveaway are prominent players. Who needs John Wayne? Did I say that? Watch out for the two main characters in future roles: Casper Van Dien as Johnny Rico and Denise Richards as Carmen. Special effects is a shoo-in for a nomination. Rock 'n Roll
Grade 91. Larry H.
"The Man Who Knew Too Little" starring Bill Murray. Negative dot com, my man. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 69 W Larry H.
Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil
I'm back, Jack! I may have had two strike outs Friday, but Clint and I hit a homer late Sunday afternoon. I got up from my nap midafternoon Sunday and ate an apple to restore my blood sugar to an acceptable level and was informed by Eric that he was spending the night at a friend's house and that my mother in law was coming to spend the night with us and to start Christmas shopping with Monique this very day. Hmmmm, I am out of here and going to the movies to see if I can make a comeback after Friday's disaster. "Midnight" was starting in 45 minutes. Great. During the 10-15 minutes that I sit in a dark theatre waiting for the flick to start, I feel very calm and relaxed on the outside, but full of anticipation and excitement on the inside, especially if the movie is big-time with a big-time director like Clint "Hang 'em High" Eastwood. I have not read the book and did not know anything about the movie other than TV ads.
The movie is spectacular, wonderful, gripping, intriguing, suspenseful, intensely interesting, and got all the right ingredients for classic entertainment. It is the current frontrunner for "Best Movie". Clint has done it again. Its "Gone With the Wind on Mescaline". John Cusack's reporter character provides the line that epitomizes the story. The setting is Savannah, Georgia, 1981, home of the Georgia Bulldogs. Kevin Spacey, as nouveau riche James Williams, is the central character that is involved in the "incident" that is the hub of the movie.
The story is about a genteel community that likes its simple yet pampered life with the required amount of gossip, sex, and money. Passion, humor, love, family secrets, art, murder, courtrooms, female impersonators, history, married women's card club, voodoo, homosexuality, high society, mystery, Midnight in cemeteries, and forgiveness.
Odds are that nominations will abound. Best Diretor, Best Actor, Best Adaptation Screenplay, Supporting Actor (couple choices - lawyer/and/or female impersonator)
This movie is why we go to the theater. We want to be a part of a winner that entertains us and gives of characters that we care about. The story is so perfect that the viewer will be hanging on to catch the next revelation. And that next scene is never a disappointment. When a show is over, notice that when the film is really special, some of the audience will sit reverently and watch the credits scroll because they are unwinding emotionally and they know that they have just witnessed greatness. This is one of those films. I am anxiously planning my second viewing. The highest grade available on first viewing is 95. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 95. Larry H.
Mr Friday started out great. Went to the pistol range in the morning and hurried back to the office to complete my "midday" tasks so I could zoom off to the show in the early pm. As I was making my choice of movies, I knew I had to choose between two opening day flicks: "Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil" directed by Clint "Hang 'em High" Eastwood or "Rainmaker" directed by Francis Ford Coppola. Time slot was on the side of the "Rainmaker" and how could I go wrong with a Coppola Film about a John Grisham story. Wrong lawyer breath. I got sooooo sleepy that my head was going in circles trying to stay awake and drool was starting to form. Not to mention that even I was becoming self concious that others in the theater might notice that I was losing the battle to stay awake. I was out of control. I had read the book so there was no suspense and I did not care if the characters were "blown up real good". My anticipation and reality were crashing and I knew I had to "Walk" As I carefully and energetically walked down the stairs quietly in the dark and in front of the screen, I tried to make the other patrons believe that my exit was to get popcorn rather than a rejection of what they were doing. Trust me, I know how to "Walk" a flick; I tricked that crowd temporaily.
But wait, maybe I can catch another flick if I'm lucky. You know I am lucky when it comes to "catching a flick". Loew's The Fountain's 18 provides handouts with all shows and times listed and of course I carry mine with me at all times to aid me in making snap decisions. After a quick assessment of the available show starting times as I stand next to the concession stand holding my list, I decide to go for broke since I am already at the theatre and see a show that one would not ordinarily choose. Aha! "Mr Bean" starring Rowan Atkinson was about to start in about 15 minutes in theater #11. I purchase another ticket, get some popcorn with extra butter and a Dr. Pepper for a "pick me up" and proceed triumphantly to ole #11 "to your left". I enter the auditorium as the previews begin and check to see how many folks are already in their seats just like I always do so I can strategically pick a seat that is "just right". No problem. There are no other humans to be seen. Always the optimist, I conclude that I will be able to scream with laughter uninhibited and will enjoy this offbeat comedy with much glee and satisfaction. I did let out a booming laugh when Mr. Bean got some kleenex stuck in his nose and let it dangle as though it was a booger. That was the highlight. At least when I "walked" I did not have to try to fake out the audience. Rock 'N Roll.
"Rainmaker" Grade 69 SW
"Mr Bean" Grade 65 W
Larry H.
Its Friday afternoon and I am back to my routine of movie- going. If stuff gets in my way and I do not make my movie on Friday pms, I get a little cranky. Want to see "The Jackal" but the most convenient time is not at The Fountains (Loews), but I persevere and go the extra mile(s) to a different theatre for scheduling purposes. On December 18, AMC is having a Grand Opening for 24 new theaters located between my office and home. What a country! Querry: How do you spell "theater" or "theatre"?
The Jackal is Bruce Willis, who has more wigs than Dolly Parton. The wigs and other types of disguises are used by the Jackal because few know what this world class assassin looks like and many are looking for him. The boy is real good at killing people and a Russian godfather hires the Jackal to commit a revenge assassin on a big American honcho. Jackal says he needs a lot of Jack - $70 million to be precise. Half now half later. Seems fair to the Ruskie, so the hunt begins. Sidney Portier plays the Deputy Director of the FBI who teams up with Richard Gere who is an imprisoned IRA terrorist, but he knows the Jackman. So the Feds cut a jicky deal to let Gere out and maybe a pardon in exchange for his expertise. I don't like Richard Gere and I do not like a stupid Irish accent messing up a good assassin mystery wolf hunt. Go back to Dublin. Sidney, on the other hand, can still act, but he wore his pistol about two inches to the right of his belt buckle thereby exposing his weapon if his coat was unbutton, and it was unbuttoned the entire flick. Very dorky.
The Jackal acquires some heavy duty weapons for the job and the FBI st cannot think quick enough to catch him as he slips into the US. During the planning stages the Jackal has to kill a few folks to demonstrate his cold blooded attitude and break- in his new toys. The viewer is privileged to see the stump of a severed arm that got tangled up in the "sighting in" of the main weapon. My take is that this is not a remake of the "The Day of the Jackal".
Perhaps the toughest characters in the movie are the women. They are not "lookers" but they will rip your head off and they are very accurate shooters. That's really all one could want from a "good" woman. The Russian military woman explains that her first name is "major". Sure, she has a nasty scar covering most of the right side of her face/forehead, but she is a warrior and wants to help Sidney and she is sweet on Gere. The First Lady is played by my personal friend (from the 70's) Tess Harper. Ok, she was a friend of a friend, but she knew me and liked me very much. I liked this movie a lot because I like silly little "I am going to kill you and there is nothing you can do about it you inept government types and I will make a fool of you while I'm doing it" movies. I was definitely pulling for the Jackman and he is a very evil dude. Hmmmm? Hey, its only a movie, lighten up. Rock 'n Roll
Grade 90. Larry H.
A funny thing happened on the way to see "Starship Troopers" - I didn't make it in time and had to settle for "Mad City". I figured that would not be a bad second choice since Dustin Hoffman and John Travolta were starring. Wrong movie-going breath! "Mad City" is decidely average and a disappointment. I should have known that taking kids as hotages by an aw-shucks, recently-fired, goober, museum security guard (Travolta) that is manipulted by a do- anything- for- airtime TV reporter (Hoffman) who just happens to be in the museum at the time would be a piece of .......... I am sorry but this is a family column. This review has been delaye due to computer illness.
Alan Alda plays an arrogant network anchor who trys to strong-arm Hoffman's Max Brackett off the air so the Net can take its rightful place in covering this hostage standoff that "everyone is talking about" and has the usual horde of cameras etc outside the musuem. Do you remember the "God Bomb" theory? The theory kicks in when I start praying for God to send down a bomb to blow up the characters or the scene so I can leave the theater and get on with my life. Well, God comes about as close as you can get to anwering a prayer in the conclusion of this movie and not a minute too soon.
Acting? Travolta plays a fat, dumb (oxymoron) Vinnie Barbarino. Alan Alda plays an old, misguided Benjamin Hawkeye Pierce. Hoffman plays a struggling to get back on top reporter who is ethically challenged. Hoffman is "the man" and one of the true great actors of our generation even in this formula movie.
Recently, an executive assistant for the CEO of Loew's/Sony theaters called me from LA and invited me to come out to the next Board Meeting and give the directors my perspective of the movie industry and suggest changes etc. The assistant, Lance Bickford, said that one of the Board members had heard about my reviews and inciteful take on movies. Mr. Bickford suggested a possible position as an Advisory Director so my travel to and from LA in the future would be tax deductible and would offset the approximate $1000-1500 per meeting fee. "Of course a lifetime pass to all Loew's theaters and attendance at the Academy Awards and the Sony gala would be part of the package; we really need your kind of person on our team, Mr. Harrison." I listened carefully to all that was said, but alas had to "come clean" and admit that the offer was tempting. But I could not sell out my independence and allegiance to my readers that expect me to "tell it like it is" and not be one of those "LA-types" caught up in the biz. The preceding paragraph is a complete fabrication. Rock 'n Roll
Grade 79 Larry H.
I hurried as fast as I could to make the 1:15 show that's near downtown Houston, and after fighting West Loop traffic fianally arrived in time to buy a coke, popcorn (with butter) and a hot dog (mustard and relish). Feeling good that I had covered all the basic food groups, I found my seat (non stadium seating) and began my lunch and my weekly ritual of movie-going.
"Boogie Nights" is a pornagraphic film about making pornagraphic movies. The star is Burt Reynolds; he's looking healthy. As soon I finished my lunch, I quietly left the theater and returned to Sugar Land, where I belong. I am confident that others will glean much enjoyment and social commentary from this flick, but I am not that versatile. I left shortly before the film debut of "Dirk Digler". Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 65W. Larry H.
The rain has been heavy on the Gulf Coast Texas and my pistol match was cancelled Sataurday, so I went to the show at the Fountains. Oh duh.
"Most Wanted" is a well done action movie that has zero redeeming social value and I liked it a lot. Keenen Ivory Wayans is the star a la Arnold, Sly, Bruce, Wesley, and Sean (Connery not Penn). Keenen is about to be wrongfully executed for "alleged crimes" while serving as a sniper in Desert Storm and Three Star General Jon Boy Voight bails him out and offers him the chance to serve his country again by becoming a part of a deep/deep Special Ops organiztion that legally kills people that are bad for the country and Jon Boy will tell you which ones need to be terminated. Oops, things do not go as planned and now everyone in America is trying to capture or kill our boy Keenen except a pretty young doctor played by Jill Hennessey who wins the " tightest sweater since Marilyn" award. Good action and a host of fun/silly characters: Rober Culp as a rich no-good business tycoon and Paul Sorvino as Deputy Director of CIA. Voight again proves that he is one of the giants.
Most cop cars involved/wrecked with no arrest, most missed shots while aiming at point blank range - 2,576, best weapons, best computer/email code breaking in under 30 seconds, most shaved heads, most use of the "F" word, and most testosterone.
Keenen used the new militay special ops pistol by H&K throughout the movie. We have many closeups of this fine firearm. I am pretty sure that God wants me to have one, too.
Keenen wrote the screenplay. So, now I have a plan to write a screenplay that is centered around an international spy team of brothers. One of the brothers will pose as a mild- mannered, tall, lanky, bespectacled, rugged good looks, personal injury lawyer from somewhere in Texas and the other brother will be Brad Pitt. Spring '99. Rock 'n Roll
Grade 89. Larry H.
"Seven Years in Tibet". Starring Brad Pitt. It seemed like it took "Seven Years" to watch this movie when actually it only lasted 2 hours and 26 minutes. This movie is an example of the "latrine" theory which goes something like this: if I can't watch a movie without the need to go to the latrine (even if it has electric eyes) during the flick, then the movie has real problems. I had to "go" what can I tell ya. This movie is an epic, which means it lasts more than 2 hours and involves a war and mountains as a backdrop in a foriegn land. The film began in mid 1939 in Austria (the Nazi's are coming) and Brad/Heinrich Harrer begins a so- called true story by leaving his pregnant wife while he does his thing climbing mountains and such for the next twelve years and becomes a close personal friend with the 12 year old Dalai Lama at a time when no "foreigners" are allowed in Tibet. Plot sounds intriguing which is why I was so disappointed because slow and uninteresting is more accurrate. Heinrich did not meet the Dalai Lama until we were one hour and ten minutes into this "epic". The story began with great expectations with young Heinrich and his band of mountaineers captured by the Germans and imprisoned in a POW camp for a couple years and Heinrich even escaped more often than Steve McQueen did in the "The Great Escape". Note: It has been said that I look like Brad Pitt.
The director/producer Jean-Jacques Annaud blew it big time. He will definitely need the Euro/Asian overseas crowd to bail him out. Hey, maybe the Tibetan folks could help bail him out and buy some tickets.....Nah, the Chinese are still POed about this whole "monk" and "religion" thing. The cinematography is beautiful and the Academy will make an obligatory nomination for Best Costumes as is the custom for movies that are pretty and pitiful.
When I add a "W" after the assigned numerical grade after seeing a movie, the "W" stands for "Walked Out". I apologize for not walking out on this one so you could experience your first "W", but I lost my guts. Getting soft in my old age. BTW, the letter "S" after a numerical grade means I went to sleep during the flick. Happens. Yawns don't count, I am talking unconcious and possible drool. Rock "N Roll.
Grade 73. Larry H.
Starring Morgan Freeman as a forensic police detective from Washington D.C. who goes down to Durham, NC to help solve a serial murder because his niece has been missing for four days. Freeman plays Dr Alex Cross with near perfection. The co star is Ashley Judd, a surgical intern, who becomes deeply emeshed in all of the bizarre web of murder, torture, blood, sadness, love, hatefulness, cruelty, and mystery. Freeman and Judd team up as only a Hollywood script would support. But what a script- adapted from the best selling novel by James Patterson. Riveting, scary, twists and turns, and the viewer gets to feel the action and participate by "reading" the clues as they unfold. I remained intense throughout the movie and was somewaht physically drained at the end of the 110 minutes.
This is the show we have been waiting for during the year 1997. Its a big winner and will garner 5-7 nominations. Best Actor, Best Supporting Actress, Best Screenplay Adaption, Editing, Best Movie, Best Director and maybe some other nominations that I don't fully understand, but they count when totally a film's nominations. The crowd was small, but when the movie was over about 1/3 of them hung around quietly in their seats to watch the credits and savor the moment and to catch their breath because they, too, were tired and drained.
Hello "Silence of the Lambs" and "Seven". Most of you people should not see this film alone. I am a professional, please do not try it alone unless you are skilled. Rock 'n Roll
Grade 95. Larry H.
"Peacemaker" is a big budget, fast moving, pretty film with pretty boy Geroge Clooney as Lt. Colonel (Airborne/Ranger) Tom Devoe and too thin Nicole Kidman as Dr Kelly, a Phd type from the White House. Renegade nuclear weapons must be stopped and George and Nicole are up for the task. Oh, duh. Even the music, sound, and backgroud choir a la "Hunt for Red October" are well done and big budget. Fires and bombs are powerful. The stage is several continents and world peace/war. George's character is more cunning, quick witted, and has more govermental authority than Harrison Ford's Dr Ryan. George can take a hit and shoot as well as Bruce Willis and Mel Gibson. Colonel Devoe even makes a tactical reload and actually changed mags while holding off the bad guys with only the steady aim of his Army issue M9 Beretta. Nicole played the smart and tough professional "female" like her buddies Demi Moore and Jodi Foster. But one does not need a program to indicate who is from Venus and who is from Mars. Hollywood still made sure that George was the no nonsense answer to the real bad guys and commander in combat while Nicole was saavy. Oh, duh. Formula movie.
Elvis is not dead. Rock 'n' roll.
Grade 85. Larry H.
Friday Sep 26th. The Fountains. I had planned to go to "In and Out" at 1:15pm and be back at the office by 3:15pm and was out of theater #2 by 2:56pm and glanced at the starting time of the show at theater #1 on the way out when lo and behold "Peacemaker" was starting in 4 minutes. I took that as a sign from God that He wanted me to see two movies today, so I hurried to the latrine where the facilities are outstanding with electric-eye start and stop flush and wash basin. What a country! Quickly, I bought another ticket (yes, I considered not buying a ticket since I was legally already in the theater area), but as a professional critic, such an act of fraud would be unethical.
"In and Out" is loaded with great actors and comedians and they carry the film in spite of storyline. Is he gay or not and ........... Joan Cusack steals the show with a performance worthy of Lucy or Carol Burnette. The price of her contract will go way up. Best line of the film is uttered by a student/Mike at gradutation ceremonies. The graduation scene itself is almost worth the price of admission. Debbie Reynolds as Kevin Kline's mother reminds us that the ole gal is still cookin. Bob Newhart is the principal at Kevin/Howard's school. That's casting genius in itself. Kevin and Joan are both High School English teachers in small town Indiana and are about to get married when hometown hero Matt Dillon wins an oscar and in his acceptance speech thanks his English teacher Howard "who is gay". Oops. Tom Selleck and Wilford Brimley give solid performances.
Grade 88.
And then there were four. Saw this flick opening day Friday September 19 at the "Fountains 18" accompanied by my nephew and his new wife, Chris and Rebecca. They are real pretty people, entertainer-actor types visiting from California, who were willing to tag along with Uncle Larry to see what makes him so amped up every Friday afternoon. I made an exception just this once and allowed someone other than Monique and Eric to make the trip, but there were certain conditions: I pick the movie, the time to attend, pick the seats but they can't sit near enough to touch me, and I pay for the ticket. The discussion after the movie was great fun, but we suffer from a generation gap and do not agree on this review.
LA Confidential is about the dirty little secrets of some dirty little cops set in circa 1953 LA. In the beginning of the saga, we learn that the West Coast Al Copone, Mickey Cohen, has recently gone away to serve some hard time and his absence has left a giant void in the balance of power among power grabbers. We are introduced to a sack- full of characters - cops, prostitutes, reporters, actors, murderers etc and then we are off to the races with more crimes and murders committed than Josey Wales. Sex, violence, wife beating, dope, blood, racist murders and simple abuse and planting of evidence is routine if it is done for "justice". Near the end of the movie, all main characters have serious facial bruises and cuts, and I lost track of who I was pulling for but my recollection is that they were beating each other. Which was OK with me, because I didn't care if they all died. Remember the God/Bomb theory expressed about 6 or 7 movies ago? It goes like this: sometime during the movie I realize that I wish God would send down a bomb and blow up every one involved in the story so we can get on with our lives and quit wasting time. Heroes: none. Characaters I cared about even if they were villians or corrupt: 2 - the characters played by Kevin Spacey and Danny De Vito. Those two actors were men among boys. Speaking of boys, look for a couple of hunks to resurface soon because of their strong roles as lead cops: Russell Crowe and Guy Pearce.
Watch the people. The movie started at 1:30 pm opening day and there were six folks in attendance - we acccounted for half. About 15-20 minutes before the 2 hour and 15 minutes was over, one guy left and then about 5 minutes before the final scene, another man left, "and then there were four." Rock N Roll.
Grade 75. Larry H.
Sunday afternoon September 14, 1997, I have been to church, spent time with the wife and son, taken a nap, paid a few bills, football games are not good, too hot to go to the gun range, so what's a boy to do? Go to the show of course.
"The Full Monty" is a delight and fun to play along with our six unemployed blokes who are willing to try anything to earn a few quid since getting laid off at the the South Yorkshire steel mill. Willing to dance and strip is the bright idea of the main character played by Robert Carlyle as Gaz. The film is solid British and could not possibly have been made in Hollywood by Hollywood types. If you like the British comedy TV shows on Channel 8 Saturday nights, you will love this show. This movie will cut across all lines of enjoyment and cause diagreements even among spouses who see it together. The story is about some mates that are trying to be brave and goofy at the same time. Their bodies are the key to the characters - ranging from hard bodies to middle age gray. Their lack of talent or training for such an undertaking does not stop the quest, but how far will they go - will they go "the full monty" and take it all off?
I really cared about these guys and was rooting for them to be successful even though I wasn't sure what it was they wanted. That's all a successful movie is required to do isn't it? Do I care about the characters - and the answer was a resounding "yes". The blokes use a lot of foul language, but they are angry and disheartened most of the show. Smoking cigarettes is a favorite passtime. I felt compassion, sadness, laughter, joy, love, and tenderness, which is requirement #2: Do I care enough to become emotional involved with the characters.
This movie has "cult" following possibilities. Glad I took a chance on this movie on a lazy Sunday afternoon. Rock n Roll.
Grade 86 Larry H.
Starring Michael Douglas as a charactar/Nicholas Van Orter with the personality of the Harrison Ford character in "Sabrina". Too rich, too cold, too sad, too bad. And Madonna reject Sean Penn. Sean, Nick's brother, was one of the few glimmers of light in this rather dark flick. It was soooooooo dark that Nick's office and home are devoid of light and life early in the film and it goes downhill from there. This show is a combo of an old "Twilight" episode and "Trading Places" and I say "who gives a rat's foot!" if the "game" fills in the "missing part" of my life. The following is the top ten one-word adjectives that come to mind when reviewing this film that premiered today:
- Lame
- Blame
- Shameshame
- Booooooring
- Predictable
- Bust
- Bomb
- Actingbad
- Screenplayfart
- Directingsucks
What a waste of talent and money. Sean and Michael are big boys and they cannot save this movie. It will be a flop. The crowd was sparce for a 1:00pm opening day crowd. I start evaluating the "attendance" and thus the box office potential of a movie as I pull in the parking lot. Had a bad feeling before I parked. The guns were even nerdy.
Need to explain some of the magic of my grading system. A grade of 69 is my way of saying that I want my money back, and a grade of 95 is a home run get out of my way I am so excited about this movie I can't hardly stand it and I plan to see it again real soon. Only two movies have ever been rated as high as 99. There has never been a "100". Not yet.
Grade 70. Larry H.
Loew's Theatre: Aug 22 opening day
Our girl Jane is much man. Demi Moore is the first female trainee to go through Navy Seal training. The Seals are the baddest of the baddest and everybody knows it. The training is awesome and well presented by Director Ridley Scott. We pull for "our girl Jane" and hope the Master Chief, the baddest of the baddest of the baddest, does not kill her in the process. Some political shenanigans ala Senator Anne Bancroft, but the movie is about Lt. Jordan Oneal, her trials and triumphs. The movie was fast paced and fun to watch. Of course, I am uniquely qualified to report on this military movie because I served on active duty for 145 days at Fort Polk, La, in 1970. It was hell, and we were Boy Scouts compared to what Demi had to endure.The guns/rifles/bombs/ were the best of the season. The hard bodies will excite the ladies because the Seal class is all male except our girl. And what a body on Demi! I am sure this movie is trying to make a point of some sort about women in the military, but I don't care. I enjoyed the action a bunch. The use of sound and action type music and quick movement of the camera to emphasize the thrills was effective throughout. Pretty movie. Tidy ending so I could leave the theatre feeling that all is right with the world. The title is stupid and bad marketing, but is believable and fitting for the script. It get an R rating primarily for language, but deserves special note when Jordan utters the line of the movie..."suck my dick". Demi and this flick will be a big box office hit. It gets my seal of approval.
Grade 93. Larry H.
Its still a box office bonanza and somebody is making large amounts of cash off this second-rate hit. Saw it at The Fountains on Labor Day and it was so crowded that I had to sit by someone. Go figure. This country needs raw comedy and that's what you get with "Money Talks". This film will make Chris Tucker the next Jim Carey because Chris carried this movie singlehandedly with jive-talk one liners, trash talk cussin, and bizzare antics that only Chris's character could pull off. Tuckers' Franklin Hatchett was ghetto funny and cop wise. His base of operation is a car wash and this silly murder for diamonds plot has him hooked up with Charlie Sheen the washed-up-about-to-get-married TV investigative reporter. Hello Nick and Eddie. But our boys did it in less than 48 hours.
Please note that we have a new winner in the "weapons" department thanks primarily to 4 or 5 sets of bad guys and Franklin's boyhood chum from the hood that shoots a bazooka rocket while sucking on a tootsie roll pop. Speaking of guns and such, have you noticed that my reviews lately include a compulsory reference to the firearms used in the flick? Well, its because Hollywood has the good sense to mix a little fun and gun. Recall the arsenals exhibited in "Air Force One", "Ulees Gold", "Conspiracy Theory", "Cop Land" and "G I Jane". Power to the people and right on 2nd Amendment.
This movie should be seen when you have seen all the other good movies that are out or wait for video and have some fun with it as you wander around Blockbuster looking for just that right kind of movie and your significant other sighs "....Honey, I just want something funny and light...." Watch for future Chris Tucker appearances. He's a slam dunk. Rock 'n Roll.
Grade 81 Larry H.
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